"My conscience wants S.T.A.L.K.E.R. to win over the world. And my subconscious is yearning for a slice of juicy Pellicle. But what do I want?"

A fantastically detailed game plagued by a predictably lazy port and heinous controls. Developing ghost pics of the devs and programmers? Using puppy pee to avoid bloodthirsty wolves? S-Tier. However, I don’t need to be reminded this game is 25 years old to forgive its immortal sins. Heed the advice given at the end of game and move on. It should’ve ended with Rex!

LET THE WORLD BE TO ALL EXCEPT THE LAZOREVO NORTH KEROTAN!!!!!! PS, I achieved "It Ain't Easy Being Green" but at what cost?!