This would be rated 7/10 by journalists if it wasn't zelda

Fortnite invented floating islands

Everytime i look at one i get the urge to piss on the guitar's strumbar

David Cage should have his fingers taped to his palm for eternity for writing everything he did

This review was written before the game released

Konami is hungry, they will fuck up this remake, the ports, and never port mgs4 (this one is a good thing)

Slop of a genre turned from coal to absolute gem, billions must play.

Zero build niggas on suicide watch

Honestly, i never expected to like this game so much, i already liked max payne 1 a lot, was it fueled by my extreme dislike and general like of the public for max payne 2? I dont really know.

I've read so many times about the cutscenes in between every shootout that i ended up expecting more than i saw, which kind of helped me not feeling drowned in the cinematics, because i really hate when a game has too many cinematics, they feel like a good excuse to separate each shootout since there's no saves cumming like in the other two games.

I dont really know how to feel about this game 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘥 to max payne 1, a part of me wants to say its even better, but goddamn max payne 1 was an experience.

It's been a long time i played a game that got me glued to the screen and grabbed me by the balls so hard due to its difficulty, max payne 1 was hard, but not really difficult, im even ashamed to say that i played this game in normal difficulty because i've been playing every game i play in hard for years. At some point i was fucking starving, if i didnt care i would just close the game, get up, eat something, and get back to it, but this time i just went and continued playing what was left of the game.

More about the game itself, i would rather have a less humoristic, and more "serious" writting than whatever bullshit was written for max payne 2.

This is one of those games that im going to absolutely replay, i barely replay games, but man...

Also the fucking drums at the last chapters, i havent heard such adrenaline inducing drums since L4D(1) ost.


Can someone give me the contact info of the nintendo intern that pays everyone who gives this game 5 stars

I remember modding this and seeing some random anime girl hitting another one because she loved some other girl, it was pretty wild and i laughed a lot.

Dopamine receptor fryer, you dont actually enjoy this.

People who havent played more hack n slash games will give this 5 stars

Overrated tech demo that ruined a generation of gamers and open world games

There's something... extremely engaging about this game, despite my dislike or, not being able to enjoy that much games like this, e.g. deep rock galactic, i get a feeling of "yeah i want to play a lot more" from this, and i can fully understand that because this runs like a japanese mid life cycle ps3 game on my pc and even with that shitty performance im still having fun.

This is blood but for zoomers