Ikoms
11 reviews liked by Ikoms
Evil and fucked up Yuri, what is there not to love?
This review contains spoilers
this is my second time playing this game and I'll be honest, i like it less. I'm gonna list what i dislike about this game, it will be kinda scattered, but whatever.
This game completely fails to understand what made the first game so great and just falls apart. Everything the first game does well, this game does poorly. there's more bosses, and most of them are bland and forgettable save for about 3. The humor in this is crude and forgettable. The first game had plenty of crude humor but it was all with purpose and written well. Travis jerks off his beam katana cause he thinks its funny and the fact that a grown man finds it funny is whats funny. It also accurately reflects his character; a loser. in this game the joke is that the battery meter is a dick, its like a boner, do you get it? They also make travis out to be some fucking cool guy that is badass and what not. I know in the first game he says cool one liners and kills people but travis was still a loser, its what makes him stand out and what makes him endearing. in this i really dont find his character unique. in the first game, sylvia is shown teasing travis as a means to further get him to murder and she is also always shown as sexual when talking to travis, and it always has to do with the story, this game turns sylvia into a brutally, poorly written, 1 note character who only serves to be fanservice. (granted i appreciate that they end up together). The first games jobs were "boring" (i found them extremely fun) and mundane because the life travis lives outside of being a killer is boring and mundane, it reflects that life can be boring and you can live your whole life without purpose. this game trades that for annoying, far too long snes games that are just sooooo bad imo. This games story is also really poorly written, since its just a less good version of the first game. Also, what is the point of making shinobu almost kiss travis, whats that serve? As far as combat goes, yeah i guess technically it is better, but the first one has a special charm to it that i absolutely adore, this one has alot of really spongy enemies and the wrestling moves are far less hype. In the first game, you could ride around town with your bike, the town was really unpopulated and the town felt dead. this really added to the atmosphere of everything and really made Travis's life feel boring, its all intentional. The second game removes that, which, i get it, some people don't care about the artsy or the meta aspects of the first game, they find it boring. but i dont, i loved that apsect, it makes the game soooo special and unique. Here's something that might be nitpicky, how the fuck did henry get beat by a boss he literally one shots in the first game?????? what was up with that??? speaking of STRANGE fucking decisions, why have travis kill 2 completely innocent black women, and say absolutely nothing, and then kill like 25 white cheerleaders and claim to feel bad for killing them. Whether or not thats intentionally racist as fuck isn't important, its just really REALLY bad writing and is also racist. Level design in this is also less good, every area in the first one felt really interesting, and cool. i couldnt wait to see what was next. this one every area kinda blends into one and other or just feels bland. the enemy design never changes and the bosses dont get introduced at the start of the level, hell most of them dont even have flashy names, they're just called "charlie mcdonald" or "chole walsh". I really do not like how this game presents its levels. I also can't for the life of me figure out what the fuck is up with sylvias weird "sexy" cutscenes. i truly don't know what the point of that is. The style in this game feels gross, and poorly done. Also i have no idea if this is a bug but at the start of every level, music doesnt play and i do not know why. truthfully, from a non die hard fans perspective this game is like a 2.5 or something, but to me, its a 1 because of how disappointing it is. This game is such a disappointment to me because i love the first one with all my heart and this one just does not understand what made the first one so great. it's a shame really.
This game completely fails to understand what made the first game so great and just falls apart. Everything the first game does well, this game does poorly. there's more bosses, and most of them are bland and forgettable save for about 3. The humor in this is crude and forgettable. The first game had plenty of crude humor but it was all with purpose and written well. Travis jerks off his beam katana cause he thinks its funny and the fact that a grown man finds it funny is whats funny. It also accurately reflects his character; a loser. in this game the joke is that the battery meter is a dick, its like a boner, do you get it? They also make travis out to be some fucking cool guy that is badass and what not. I know in the first game he says cool one liners and kills people but travis was still a loser, its what makes him stand out and what makes him endearing. in this i really dont find his character unique. in the first game, sylvia is shown teasing travis as a means to further get him to murder and she is also always shown as sexual when talking to travis, and it always has to do with the story, this game turns sylvia into a brutally, poorly written, 1 note character who only serves to be fanservice. (granted i appreciate that they end up together). The first games jobs were "boring" (i found them extremely fun) and mundane because the life travis lives outside of being a killer is boring and mundane, it reflects that life can be boring and you can live your whole life without purpose. this game trades that for annoying, far too long snes games that are just sooooo bad imo. This games story is also really poorly written, since its just a less good version of the first game. Also, what is the point of making shinobu almost kiss travis, whats that serve? As far as combat goes, yeah i guess technically it is better, but the first one has a special charm to it that i absolutely adore, this one has alot of really spongy enemies and the wrestling moves are far less hype. In the first game, you could ride around town with your bike, the town was really unpopulated and the town felt dead. this really added to the atmosphere of everything and really made Travis's life feel boring, its all intentional. The second game removes that, which, i get it, some people don't care about the artsy or the meta aspects of the first game, they find it boring. but i dont, i loved that apsect, it makes the game soooo special and unique. Here's something that might be nitpicky, how the fuck did henry get beat by a boss he literally one shots in the first game?????? what was up with that??? speaking of STRANGE fucking decisions, why have travis kill 2 completely innocent black women, and say absolutely nothing, and then kill like 25 white cheerleaders and claim to feel bad for killing them. Whether or not thats intentionally racist as fuck isn't important, its just really REALLY bad writing and is also racist. Level design in this is also less good, every area in the first one felt really interesting, and cool. i couldnt wait to see what was next. this one every area kinda blends into one and other or just feels bland. the enemy design never changes and the bosses dont get introduced at the start of the level, hell most of them dont even have flashy names, they're just called "charlie mcdonald" or "chole walsh". I really do not like how this game presents its levels. I also can't for the life of me figure out what the fuck is up with sylvias weird "sexy" cutscenes. i truly don't know what the point of that is. The style in this game feels gross, and poorly done. Also i have no idea if this is a bug but at the start of every level, music doesnt play and i do not know why. truthfully, from a non die hard fans perspective this game is like a 2.5 or something, but to me, its a 1 because of how disappointing it is. This game is such a disappointment to me because i love the first one with all my heart and this one just does not understand what made the first one so great. it's a shame really.
Heavy Rain
2010
this game is fucking terrible and becomes even more terrible in retrospect once the twist is revealed. David cage loves writing women terribly and making every single second of his cool movie games hollow and vapid. Literally just google "crime drama" and watch one of the movies that pops up and it will probably be better than this.
Beyond: Two Souls
2013
David cage don't write his women characters to be sexually assaulted challenge: IMPOSSIBLE!!!. not to mention one of the endings is about her ending up with a guy that tricked her into committing war crimes. What a shit show. HOW is david cage so popular??????? EVERY game he makes has so many contridictions and its themes implode themselves and always somehow manage to have some random shit in it that david cage doesn't actually understand but thought was cool so he put it in his game.
Indigo Prophecy
2005
this game is such a David Cage game. it takes an interesting premise and slowly makes it more stupid and bad as the game goes on. How he does it is beyond me.
Junpei: huh, theres some bread on this shelf, cool
June: Bread? Did you know that Bread is a staple food prepared from a dough of flour (usually wheat) and water, usually by baking. Throughout recorded history and around the world, it has been an important part of many cultures' diet. It is one of the oldest human-made foods, having been of significance since the dawn of agriculture, and plays an essential role in both religious rituals and secular culture. Bread may be leavened by naturally occurring microbes (e.g. sourdough), chemicals (e.g. baking soda), industrially produced yeast, or high-pressure aeration, which creates the gas bubbles that fluff up bread. In many countries, commercial bread often contains additives to improve flavor, texture, color, shelf life, nutrition, and ease of production. Bread is one of the oldest prepared foods. Evidence from 30,000 years ago in Europe and Australia revealed starch residue on rocks used for pounding plants. It is possible that during this time, starch extract from the roots of plants, such as cattails and ferns, was spread on a flat rock, placed over a fire and cooked into a primitive form of flatbread. The oldest evidence of bread-making has been found in a 14,500-year-old Natufian site in Jordan's northeastern desert. Around 10,000 BC, with the dawn of the Neolithic age and the spread of agriculture, grains became the mainstay of making bread. Yeast spores are ubiquitous, including on the surface of cereal grains, so any dough left to rest leavens naturally. An early leavened bread was baked as early as 6000 BC in southern Mesopotamia, cradle of the Sumerian civilization, who may have passed on the knowledge to the Egyptians around 3000 BC. The Egyptians refined the process and started adding yeast to the flour. The Sumerians were already using ash to supplement the dough as it was baked. There were multiple sources of leavening available for early bread. Airborne yeasts could be harnessed by leaving uncooked dough exposed to air for some time before cooking. Pliny the Elder reported that the Gauls and Iberians used the foam skimmed from beer, called barm, to produce "a lighter kind of bread than other peoples" such as barm cake. Parts of the ancient world that drank wine instead of beer used a paste composed of grape juice and flour that was allowed to begin fermenting, or wheat bran steeped in wine, as a source for yeast. The most common source of leavening was to retain a piece of dough from the previous day to use as a form of sourdough starter, as Pliny also reported.] The ancient Egyptians, Greeks, and Romans all considered the degree of refinement in the bakery arts as a sign of civilization. The Chorleywood bread process was developed in 1961; it uses the intense mechanical working of dough to dramatically reduce the fermentation period and the time taken to produce a loaf. The process, whose high-energy mixing allows for the use of grain with a lower protein content, is now widely used around the world in large factories. As a result, bread can be produced very quickly and at low costs to the manufacturer and the consumer. However, there has been some criticism of the effect on nutritional value.
ACTUAL REVIEW: this game is really neat, its a lot of fun though very tedious in some parts, some puzzles are more just frustrating and time consuming and not as fun. specifically the math oriented ones since its not really a puzzle, just a math problem that takes an annoying amount of time to finish. However the story is great and the characters are real fun, i wish the ending had a little bit more closure BUT there's 2 more sequels so who knows
June: Bread? Did you know that Bread is a staple food prepared from a dough of flour (usually wheat) and water, usually by baking. Throughout recorded history and around the world, it has been an important part of many cultures' diet. It is one of the oldest human-made foods, having been of significance since the dawn of agriculture, and plays an essential role in both religious rituals and secular culture. Bread may be leavened by naturally occurring microbes (e.g. sourdough), chemicals (e.g. baking soda), industrially produced yeast, or high-pressure aeration, which creates the gas bubbles that fluff up bread. In many countries, commercial bread often contains additives to improve flavor, texture, color, shelf life, nutrition, and ease of production. Bread is one of the oldest prepared foods. Evidence from 30,000 years ago in Europe and Australia revealed starch residue on rocks used for pounding plants. It is possible that during this time, starch extract from the roots of plants, such as cattails and ferns, was spread on a flat rock, placed over a fire and cooked into a primitive form of flatbread. The oldest evidence of bread-making has been found in a 14,500-year-old Natufian site in Jordan's northeastern desert. Around 10,000 BC, with the dawn of the Neolithic age and the spread of agriculture, grains became the mainstay of making bread. Yeast spores are ubiquitous, including on the surface of cereal grains, so any dough left to rest leavens naturally. An early leavened bread was baked as early as 6000 BC in southern Mesopotamia, cradle of the Sumerian civilization, who may have passed on the knowledge to the Egyptians around 3000 BC. The Egyptians refined the process and started adding yeast to the flour. The Sumerians were already using ash to supplement the dough as it was baked. There were multiple sources of leavening available for early bread. Airborne yeasts could be harnessed by leaving uncooked dough exposed to air for some time before cooking. Pliny the Elder reported that the Gauls and Iberians used the foam skimmed from beer, called barm, to produce "a lighter kind of bread than other peoples" such as barm cake. Parts of the ancient world that drank wine instead of beer used a paste composed of grape juice and flour that was allowed to begin fermenting, or wheat bran steeped in wine, as a source for yeast. The most common source of leavening was to retain a piece of dough from the previous day to use as a form of sourdough starter, as Pliny also reported.] The ancient Egyptians, Greeks, and Romans all considered the degree of refinement in the bakery arts as a sign of civilization. The Chorleywood bread process was developed in 1961; it uses the intense mechanical working of dough to dramatically reduce the fermentation period and the time taken to produce a loaf. The process, whose high-energy mixing allows for the use of grain with a lower protein content, is now widely used around the world in large factories. As a result, bread can be produced very quickly and at low costs to the manufacturer and the consumer. However, there has been some criticism of the effect on nutritional value.
ACTUAL REVIEW: this game is really neat, its a lot of fun though very tedious in some parts, some puzzles are more just frustrating and time consuming and not as fun. specifically the math oriented ones since its not really a puzzle, just a math problem that takes an annoying amount of time to finish. However the story is great and the characters are real fun, i wish the ending had a little bit more closure BUT there's 2 more sequels so who knows
Garten of Banban
2023
Getting banned from the Discord server had more lore and depth to it than this entire game.
There Is No Game
2015
picturing the developer in my head as a big Stanley parable fan. bro probably has posters of the game in his room and shit.
batman rhythm game
wahh wahh im bruce wayne my parents are dead wahhh wahh im arguably just as insane as my enemies and me being trapt in an asylum is thematic of my own personal journey wahhhh boo hoo shut up nerd