gaymercreature
I adore this! The art is cute as hell!!
This review contains spoilers
Generic noir visual novel. The sexualization of Vera Blanc in the art and dialogue is so cringe (is she 16?? the intro introduces her as 14, skips 2 years forward, and then stops keeping track of time as far as I can tell). The bit where her towels falls off is VERY CRINGE. Setting aside the weird sus shit, this just isn't good. I gave it an earnest shot, but the mystery doesn't evolve well. The optional minigames are awful. It's also way more focused on small town crime drama than werewolves or the occult. At least the werewolf wasn't fake I guess.
Seriously tho fuck this game. It's so fucking vile. Racist, misoygnistic trash. As other reviews have mentioned, it's also bland, weirdly dated, and not fun at all. The stealth and rpg elements are so shallow and bad, I can't understand why they're here. AND NO GORE???
PS: Whoever designed the werewolf's butt to look like THAT... I see you and thank you. but that cake can't redeem this shit.
PS: Whoever designed the werewolf's butt to look like THAT... I see you and thank you. but that cake can't redeem this shit.
I have played a few hours of Prime but never finished it so I guess this is my first Metroid! It's pretty neat all around. I would not have fared well without a guide. Fucking love the title theme
Great tracks. Delivers scripted action super well. Humor is kind of 50/50 for me but this is without a doubt the funniest, most well-written Borderlands game ever. Fun characters. Closing on a mecha vs. kaiju fight! Talk about payoff.
It's interesting to note how many jokes there are in this telltale game where the punchline is just managers/bosses suck. Hard not to think about that in the context of the company's shitty treatment of its workers
It's interesting to note how many jokes there are in this telltale game where the punchline is just managers/bosses suck. Hard not to think about that in the context of the company's shitty treatment of its workers
1997
I didn't unlock everything but after getting all the character endings I think I'm ready to move on to the next game. I had fun with this! The boar lady is cool.
2019
navigational nightmare. busy work that i hesitate to call mini games. sometimes terribly slow. still, this is some cool shit
2010
Remedy does pulp REALLY WELL. I loved this tons, though it got a bit tiring towards the end and the final ep felt stretched out. Combat got a bit old but it was solid and fun. Beautiful looking game. In particular I loved how much it incorporated music to build atmosphere. I enjoyed the shit out of standing by the radios and watching the tvs lol
I wish I could say this is a diamond in the rough. Really it's on the verge of being okay w/ some neat shit hidden in literal shit. Characters are dull and super obnoxious. Fighting is clunky but ngl the longer I played, the better it felt to control.
Barker's premise is wild and great and the loredumps are pretty neat. I like the game as it descends deeper and deeper into the far past and Barker's nasty sexy extremity of dark fantasy. There's some cool as fuck monsters here.
It starts out looking like complete ass and then there are some genuinely beautiful designs towards the end. The level design itself isn't ever that great tho, just twisting tunnels and rooms one after another. Sadly, the game is mostly an ugly slog, then it gets better, then it ends.
Too bad this didn't get a sequel cuz I could see Jericho II refining its mechanics, picking up the ending, and becoming the cult horror shooter that this sadly doesn't quite manage to be. The soundtrack is great tho! Witches With Guns would be a sick band name
Also, between this and REVillage, I realize I find fps games way more interesting when you're fighting huge fantasy monsters
Barker's premise is wild and great and the loredumps are pretty neat. I like the game as it descends deeper and deeper into the far past and Barker's nasty sexy extremity of dark fantasy. There's some cool as fuck monsters here.
It starts out looking like complete ass and then there are some genuinely beautiful designs towards the end. The level design itself isn't ever that great tho, just twisting tunnels and rooms one after another. Sadly, the game is mostly an ugly slog, then it gets better, then it ends.
Too bad this didn't get a sequel cuz I could see Jericho II refining its mechanics, picking up the ending, and becoming the cult horror shooter that this sadly doesn't quite manage to be. The soundtrack is great tho! Witches With Guns would be a sick band name
Also, between this and REVillage, I realize I find fps games way more interesting when you're fighting huge fantasy monsters
Love how this communicates its story! And I love its story (or what I can grasp of it)!! But mechanically/puzzle-wise, I got soooo frustrated lmao.
2015
What if a game was... like a movie? That's not what this is.
What if a game was... 6 hours of stiff, prestige television inspired by the Underworld franchise of all things (but instead of being about cool monsters, human characters are at the forefront 90% of the time) that mayyyyybe will get good in the 2nd season but the 1st season was so reserved and boring it didn't get renewed? That's it. So it's just this overwrought prologue condemned to never continue.
Also, like Underworld, it's politically rancid. Somehow it's even worse tho. Like... it's an althistory setting where an empire has advanced tech and magic and you play as the bad guys. And they aren't bad cuz they're imperialists. They're portrayed as... misguided at best? Cuz they've been infiltrated by evil, monstrous "half breed" races who are steering the empire. It's very gross (hearing "half breed" uttered over and over again was the worst). It awkwardly sidesteps a critique of empire and white supremacy by pointing the finger at fantasy monsters. It's also super uncompelling.
I only played this cuz it has werewolves and it was extremely disappointing on that front, they're barely in it lol
What if a game was... 6 hours of stiff, prestige television inspired by the Underworld franchise of all things (but instead of being about cool monsters, human characters are at the forefront 90% of the time) that mayyyyybe will get good in the 2nd season but the 1st season was so reserved and boring it didn't get renewed? That's it. So it's just this overwrought prologue condemned to never continue.
Also, like Underworld, it's politically rancid. Somehow it's even worse tho. Like... it's an althistory setting where an empire has advanced tech and magic and you play as the bad guys. And they aren't bad cuz they're imperialists. They're portrayed as... misguided at best? Cuz they've been infiltrated by evil, monstrous "half breed" races who are steering the empire. It's very gross (hearing "half breed" uttered over and over again was the worst). It awkwardly sidesteps a critique of empire and white supremacy by pointing the finger at fantasy monsters. It's also super uncompelling.
I only played this cuz it has werewolves and it was extremely disappointing on that front, they're barely in it lol
2020
Tbh I prefer this over REmake2. It's nowhere near as intricate, but I just love the story and characters much more. Jill and Carlos rule, the villain is fun, Nemesis rocks. It starts at an 11 and maintains the breakneck pace throughout its entirety. It's kind of like if RE6 was delightfully free of mechanical frustration and hit the right level of brevity/narrative competence.
2015
Clunky, frustrating to navigate, often uncomfortable/upsetting. It's as compelling as it is exhausting. Simon doesn't get it but I kind of like him. I spared myself a ton of annoying bs by playing on Safe Mode, which is something all these indie horror games with shitty stealth sections should include.
Fine little distraction, nothing deep here. I like fairytale subversions, and the idea of Red Riding Hood and the Wolf being in a mostly functional relationship is cute enough. The character models look weird, but the werewolves look better than the humans.
I don't understand the point of the trivia littered throughout the levels, though. You can find this little nugget of info within a level: "Hoodwinked, an animated film released in 2006, provides a humorous spin on the folk tale where all the characters are confronted as part of a police investigation. The film proved so successful that a sequel followed in 2011, called Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil, in which the heroes run a spy agency."
I don't understand the point of the trivia littered throughout the levels, though. You can find this little nugget of info within a level: "Hoodwinked, an animated film released in 2006, provides a humorous spin on the folk tale where all the characters are confronted as part of a police investigation. The film proved so successful that a sequel followed in 2011, called Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil, in which the heroes run a spy agency."
2012
Years ago, not long off the back of playing RE4 on the GameCube in like, 2014 for the first time, and not long after hating 5, I tried to play 6. I got maybe two chapters into Leon's scenario before I gave up. Leon wasn't funny like in 4. Helena sucked. It was just too exhausting.
But I'm glad I got it again recently while it was on sale. I chose Jake's scenario and had a lot of fun with the characters and the silliness, it was kind of the opposite of Leon and Helena's dry ass drama that had turned me away from the game. Of course, getting knocked down, dying half a dozen times to janky quick time events or vehicle sections, navigating the fucking horrible in-game item menus... that definitely took away from my enjoyment, but surprisingly, I still feel positive about my time spent with the game. Stumbling from one set piece to the next through all the indulgent melodrama, watching Jake punch the shit out of Ustanak. The credits rolling with a pop song approximated perfection.
Instead of treating this entire thing as a twenty-hour playthrough, I'm treating each scenario as its own playthrough, and I'm gonna space each out a good chunk of time to avoid getting sick. I think that's gonna be the recipe to enjoying the rest of this game. Bottom line, I'm glad the franchise reoriented itself, but I don't hate 6.
But I'm glad I got it again recently while it was on sale. I chose Jake's scenario and had a lot of fun with the characters and the silliness, it was kind of the opposite of Leon and Helena's dry ass drama that had turned me away from the game. Of course, getting knocked down, dying half a dozen times to janky quick time events or vehicle sections, navigating the fucking horrible in-game item menus... that definitely took away from my enjoyment, but surprisingly, I still feel positive about my time spent with the game. Stumbling from one set piece to the next through all the indulgent melodrama, watching Jake punch the shit out of Ustanak. The credits rolling with a pop song approximated perfection.
Instead of treating this entire thing as a twenty-hour playthrough, I'm treating each scenario as its own playthrough, and I'm gonna space each out a good chunk of time to avoid getting sick. I think that's gonna be the recipe to enjoying the rest of this game. Bottom line, I'm glad the franchise reoriented itself, but I don't hate 6.