144 Reviews liked by goodchicken


played this to cure my mgs4 woes. to cleanse my mind. to calm myself and play a game that makes sense
so .. that was foolish
i dont know what this game did to my brain but when i tell you those sewer rats genuinely honestly almost brought me to tears and made me uninstall... but then look at me now, weeks later, all i can do is look back fondly on all the crazy shit this game threw at me and how proud i am for beating it. this game transcends.... game. it is an experience that will imprint on your mind, your very soul.. your dark soul.... sorry
my character was called neon lennedy. he dressed like a tree stump and hit his enemies with a giant fiery spider's leg. i love him. i hope hes doin ok.
it kinda falls off in the second half but at that point i was addicted. and im currently trying to play dark souls 2 so i cant complain. the most important thing about playing this game is that doing so made my friends smile :)

reader, you do not know the pain i went through to play this game. my ps3 stopped working, i tried to repair it, bricked it. i bought another second hand one on fb marketplace, but to get it i had to walk for about 45 mins in the rain in the middle of the night to an area in my city where an infamous mass shooting took place. i picked it up, didnt get shot, excitedly listened to mgs2 soundtrack while i walked. i imagined i was a member of a secret anti-metal gear group on a clandestine virtuous mission of my own, to pick up a mysterious package which may contain knowledge of some new metal gear... the roadmen that passed me by were the faceless, nameless soldiers of whatever military organisation was the enemy of the day. i was ready to take them down, kill them if i had to. they are people too, i know this. but as soldiers we take the risk of death as an everyday hazard. we are all fighting for something, we all believe in something. i will remember them, once it is done. but i will not hesitate.
anyway i got the package back to base... i mean, my flat. bro sold me a broken ps3
at this point i was at my wits end, even my parents were invested in my quest to just fucking play this god damn game. they helped me out with some money to buy a refurbed ps3 and AT LAST! AT LONG LAST! A WORKING PLAYSTATION!!
i excitedly set it all up, put in another game to check that it worked... it did!!!!! THIS IS HAPPENING BABY
my friends trickled into the livestream, boy were we going to have the time of our lives watching the finale, the end to the story of solid snake and otacon. the moment we had all been waiting for..!

this game is pants. i wasted loads of time and money on it too so im gonna be more bitter about this fact, but it is a load of pants. the ONLY things i liked about it are below:
- guinea pigs
- liquid fist fight obviously went hard
- laughed a lot with my friends at all the awful shit things this game does

dont invest in nanobots

THATS RIGHT BABY!!! I DID ALL THREE IN ONE MONTH!! I CAUGHT FLU AND SMASHED THIS OUT WHILE I WAS OFF WORK!!! wHAT A THRIIIIILLL
alright enough of that.. this one had me Doubtful in the beginning. i dont love some of the level design in this and it was difficult to adjust to the new setting and mechanics, like the camouflage and catching animals. plus, i dont think that the codec characters are as good as they have been in previous games. but these things didnt stop me from enjoying the game too much (and in hindsight, i should be grateful for the codec conversations i did get. this is about mgs4. we'll get to that)
by the time i had finished the game i knew it was going to be imprinted on my brain in the same way the other two are, i was so happy with how it all culminated. this is a super cinematic game and is just as ambitious as the first two in that sense. i know its a matter of preference but i love this aspect of it. i also really liked the music, although now only a couple of tracks truly stand out. like that one... oh what's it called.. you know! that one... ahh its like... snake.. snacker? i don't know
baby twink ocelot is something i did not know i needed in my life but i absolutely did. hes my favourite iteration of ocelot (so far..?) but it took some time for him to grow on me. same with eva, who i ended up REALLY liking by the end. because she is a nice girl who wants to kiss me (snake (me)). big boss have two hands
yeah anyways thats it. not as much depth gameplay wise but packed with lore and story and Themes™. i love it's stylisation as a Bond type story, complete with a Bond theme and intro and a Bond girl (ocelot)
smashin game. good chicken, i play this game.. not for honour.... but for youuuuu

This review contains spoilers

TWO MGS GAMES IN ONE MONTH??!!! Perhaps a third??? nay... .lest?
yeah this game fucks so hard and has no problems at all except i find solidus not very compelling but who tf cares its president snake in power armour
my god this game held me hostage for a week but it felt like years, in a good way. i will think back on this time when i reflect on my mgs era, i will think about the ending til i am dead, i will think about the 'TURN THE GAME CONSOLE OFF' moment and how much it made me shit myself every day til im infodumping on the poor ppl in the nursing home about it and they strangle me to shut me up and collect the insurance payout
just as campy, exciting and compelling as its predecessor with infinitely improved gameplay, flawless soundtrack, amazing and extensive voice acting. i dont quite know what else to say about it, except what i keep saying to my very patient friends; this game feels complete. it feels like they did absolutely everything they could to finish this game to the highest quality and fit everything they wanted to in it. no part feels unfinished or neglected, everything you interact with and engage with is rewarded. i would kill someone, like a nice old lady or a toddler, to be able to wipe my memory and play this again from scratch

my friend good chicken asked me to play just this one game at some point in 2024 as part of a yearly tradition where we force each other to play one game per year, decided before jan 1st. well i jumped the gun slightly and started this one early, then finished it 5 days into the year because i couldnt put it down
this game rly pushes the boundaries of what i thought the ps1 was capable of, and those things are still impressive today. yes the game has a few problems but i think its easy to judge as somebody who could have only played this decades after its release. the only thing i really want to fault it for is the meryl plot which isnt dreadful by any means, i just think the romance between her and snake doesn't feel earned. as for the rest of the plot it stands very well on its own but does a lot to set up its themes and ask questions that we might get answers to in later games. or, not answers... just more specific and increasingly outrageous questions i guess. its all part of the fun.
im someone who loves janky gameplay and having to learn a game's language so this was a thrill for me (this is a cheeky little joke that we will understand a couple games down the line)
this marked the start of my metal gear era, my otasune obsession, my actual real snake sickness. i will never forget it.
liquid snake, i did like your sunglasses. god bless x

This review contains spoilers

Hope...is everlasting.

Where to even begin to review an expansion this deep and absorbing, I don't want to spend all day gushing about how much I loved this, describing every captivating scene at length, but I certainly could and I still will to some extent! Fundamentally, shadowbringers is an essential experience with probably the greatest final fantasy story i've ever seen. Simultaneously it is inherently tied to the overarching story built up since the game's troublesome launch and it is standalone, signalling a new beginning for the hero of the story and their allies.

Narratively this takes a big risk in my opinion, from the ending of stormblood the main setting of FFXIV is in a state of chaos and uncertainty, there are multiple angles this story could have taken that would have made sense and yet it chooses to shoot off in a wildly unexpected direction, reinventing itself in an unprecedented fashion in the process as the story's hero is thrust into an entirely new and alien world to combat threats new and old. Having to essentially begin again after everything you have achieved is a big statement and one I was very excited to see play out. The vibe of this new setting and this new direction are ushered in with an outstanding soundtrack, beautiful new locations that take full advantage of the increased potential of the next console generation and new content that is some of the best to date.

Shadowbringers marks a leap in the quality of the game's writing and adds new layers of depth to many of the existing mysteries and lore of the game's universe, deepening their meaning and my own understanding in the process. The motivations of the game's primary antagonists is established gradually through the actions of this expansions' primary villain, one of the greatest i've seen in the medium to date - Emet Selch. Emet perpetuates everything that I think works best about this expansion, since he subverts our expectations and plays on my sense of curiosity as well as the sense of treading alien ground. What makes Emet so fascinating to me isn't just that he is somehow irresistably charming and likeable despite his clearly unforgivable actions, its that he chooses to believe in the player character and follows along for the ride with no interference until the end. At this point the hero is so absurdly powerful and Emet recognises this, choosing to put his faith in him that they could somehow work together and faith in the sundered as a result; wanting to explore this possibility he serves much of the story as an onlooker and at times, even lends a helping hand. He single handedly expands the possibilities of what it means to be a villain in this universe and the ancient knowledge he dispenses (and even physically forms in the case of amaurot) reinvents the perceived truths of this game's history and future, greatly intensifying their meaning and our own motivations in the process, reaching new heights previously unexplored in any other point in the story.

Beyond this, there are mysteries, histories and motivations to be explored at many, many other angles, from the heroic sacrifices and lasting impact of the warriors of darkness and minfilia, old adversaries and allies respectively, to the garnering of new allies from many different walks of life, each coming with their own deep and interesting cultures, values and beliefs. The setting of norvrandt is large enough to have several new, exciting and unique areas to explore, but it is also contained, functioning as the last bastion of a world that has faced unimaginable calamity. With the introduction of new faces such as the Crystal Exarch and Ryne (Minfilia) to those returning such as Ardbert and to our returning allies who have remained in the first for far longer than was ever expected, almost every character tied to this expansion's main story show development and intrigue on a newfound scale. The emotional highs reached for here far exceed anything I had grown accustomed to thus far and I was completely absorbed and moved by each of my allies and my rivals' stories. The one that won my heart most of all was the Exarch. Any suspicion I had of him early on due to his enigmatic appearance was quickly removed once it was established that my allies were brought here by mistake due to a fumbled summoning spell on his part, which also served to humanise him and make him that much likeable to me. I wanted desperately to know why he had done so and was expecting vague and inconsequential retorts but instead, to my surprise, he largely wears his heart on his sleeve and is willing to answer pretty much all of your questions if there is time, which also served to strengthen my fondness for him. This fondness gradually grew to a real love for this character, the sheer enormity of his burden and his utter, unabated belief in me captured my heart and made me want to help him in turn. All beats with this character worked for me and seeing him get his happy ending is one of the most victorious moments in the entire story. Nobody deserves it like he does.

Two of my other favourites get plenty of screentime and no shortage of development in this story - the twins, Alphinaud and Alisaie. As is their nature, they approach the crisis in Norvrandt from two entirely different directions, with Alphinaud taking a more passive, diplomatic and political approach in Kholusia while Alisaie fights on the frontlines and helps those affected by the monstrous sin eaters on the ground in Amh Araeng. Both come with their own challenges which we lend our assistance with, both branching storylines serving our understanding of both the terrifying physical threats the people face and the political turmoil and manipulation under the surface - which is feeding lies and egocentrism within the ranks of Eulmore, a belief of superiority which eventually festers into all out war (Vauthry is another great villain with a fantastic VA, he's basically a massive manchild with illusions of paradise who throws constant tantrums and regularly made me laugh). The twin's different approaches bring about lasting change and an overwhelmingly positive impact to the people and the land of the first, strengthening their resolves and fostering the unity between the two when they both play to their strengths. Similarly moving stories such as those of Thancred and Ryne's relationship and father/daughter like bond which grows with time, the heartbreaking, moving and captivating story of Ardbert's final task and the inspiring resolve of the people of the Crystarium all come with their own messages of hope, community and the perseverance to build a better future that you may never see.
Even the minor/side characters have many chances to shine in this expansion such as the ever lovable and joyful eulmore couple of Chai-Nuzz and Dulia-Chai, who strive to be better and do better for their neighbours, Lyna, the devoted defender and guard captain of the Crystarium and Feo Ul, an affectionate and protective pixie whom we befriend (and are often scolded by). Each of them bring a different flavour and are unequivocally endearing to me in their own ways.

As for the actual content, shadowbringers significantly improves on the game's dungeons, trials and raids with its increased challenge, awesome visual setpieces, great trust interactions, outstanding music and interesting and unique boss mechanics that go beyond just 'dodge or mitigate the attack'. The new trust options allowing you to take who you want into a dungeon is a brilliant idea basically turning dungeons into a little jrpg excursion and the little pieces of characterisation sprinkled into the flavour of the dialogue and your allies' animated reactions to things such as the 'bridge' moment in Dohn Mheg are so great. The story serves the drama which serves the content, the soundtrack serves everything in unison and it all comes together to make for an incredible experience all round, it just ties together beautifully and I only wish it was able to accomodate slightly better graphics but I understand the undertaking that must be for an MMO of this scale and ambition. The bonus content such as the Nier raids, Eden raids and weapon trials each deserve their own appreciation too, some of the best side content that i've seen in the whole game wraps up this top quality expansion. The payoff here made everything leading up to it wholely worth it and though there are parts of this story that do trail off into some busywork and somewhat inconsequential meandering, its far limited compared to what I was used to and at the best of times, it even helps to break up the pacing in a way I actually welcome! This is a must play for any final fantasy fan, its just such a gigantic task to be able to reach and appreciate it, but I am so glad that I did.

Hey guys! I just logged Fightcade as completed 5 s- SHUT UP! This is a PLATFORM. Not a VIDEO GAME. Stop acting like you play video games by logging shit like this. Nobody cares if you played Chrome Dino and Smash Bros. Fighter Pass 3. Go play some real shit like Modern Warfare then come talk to me.

BANGER. Much better for me than DS, but I may need to just play that one again but without using the big axe. I thought the little levels for the most part were very neat and what I needed when I played it. The later little levels where you revisit a harder version of the earlier levels though? Kinda stinky. bit whiffy. I enjoyed this a whole bunch though :)

Do I only log into my backlogg'd acount to 5 star review niche indie games?
No, I also leave thumbs up on all my friends reviews and enjoy reading them.
But also, the first thing.

Holy shit! Final Profit! I played like, 12 hours over the first 2 days I bought this!
It's a fantastic mix of idle games (I love those. :)) and fun silly RPGmaker stuff. It's a solo dev and it's so creative and unique and.
Moral choices in games usually suck, right? But they're really fun here. If your tismal brain is scratched by all the same good feelings as mine, then you should check this out. :)

And when the 1.3 update comes out I'll do a NG+ run.

This review contains spoilers

Stormblood is a solid expansion but not one that felt like it built upon the foundation of FFXIV as strongly as Heavensward, there's definitely a lot more chores and busywork to be done and the general tone, while I do like it a lot, does feel very steady and one-note in comparison to Heavensward's gripping story filled with twists and turns (at least up until the later patches, which usher in a dramatic jump in overall quality).

I think the biggest success of stormblood is its overall vibe and the beauty of its locales, taking inspiration from middle eastern and far eastern culture with some jaw dropping setpieces and outstanding music. By far my favourite area and my favourite portions of the expansion came in the form of the azim steppe and its native inhabitants with their mongolian influences. The music and tone of this area gets me going, its awesome. Those 'endless fields and boundless skies' as Hien puts it were beautiful and learning about the differences in its tribes and their gods was just really fun and interesting and a nice change of pace for a game very centred around one major theme. That theme is liberation and I think for the most part it handles it quite well. There is a lot of complexity in its different cultures and the nature of how they are surviving under colonial oppression and I was particularly fond of the dissonance between Lyse's headstrong determination to free her people and the reality of the local population's struggle to even survive, let alone fight back. Stormblood is constantly highlighting the different perspectives and ways that people survive and eventually reignite their resolve but also takes time to recognise the lasting damage and consequences of the Garleans' violent conquest. Notably there is a fascinating character study into the mind of Fordola, an incredible character and an Ala Mhigan native abused and spat upon by her comrades for her family's co-operation with their oppresors - labelled a traitor by her neighbours and a savage by the Garleans, Fordola vows to achieve freedom by any means and embraces her brand of 'savage', working with the Garleans in pursuit of both liberation and vengeance for her father who died at the hands of a furious Ala Mhigan mob. Fordola's story is that of the victim of circumstance (and it isn't the only time this comes up) and the question of if or how this could ever justify her actions is one the game isn't afraid to look into, but her story is also one of redemption and I just found it really compelling.

Stormblood is a story with a lot of tragedy and melancholy but there's also a lot of hope to be found and I think for the most part it is great stuff and I was thoroughly invested, but there are times where it falls off or otherwise becomes too unbelievable. For one, there are far too many fakeouts and deaths of main characters begin to feel of little consequence unless said character dies onscreen with absolute certainty. In the patches alone I counted 4 fakeouts where you think a character is straight up dead but then they come back for various reasons, if you're going to do that you had best have a very good reason or you risk playing down everything that came before and setting up a worryingly anticlimatic precedent. Also, I would note the handling of Yotsuyu's abuse and the nonchalant attitudes of those that are supposed to protect her as a negative, as it leads to a sadly predictable outcome that feels like it does Yotsuyu dirty and doesn't properly respect her as a victim of horrific abuse and neglect. It felt like it was at its lowest when Asahi, a very obvious bad guy, cruelly brings her parents back into her life with the sole intention of causing her untold pain and misery - to which the player and their allies do nothing except scowl and call it a 'dirty trick' when it felt like they could have and should have done more. Not to mention Yotsuyu is supposed to be under strict house arrest and yet escapes and puts herself in mortal danger twice, this whole section just felt quite rushed and lazy and like it didn't respect Yotsuyu as a character - the tragic outcome of her story seems only to serve to make Gosetsu sad and ponderous and set up the plot around the Ascians pulling all the strings, which could have been done without bringing back Yotsuyu and Gosetsu, I don't know it just felt inconsequential and I don't think the storyline justifies bringing the two back, it certainly could have done but I don't think it does. But saying this the tsukiyomi trial is absolutely hype and Gosetsu's spirit showing up to protect her was so awesome.

The new dungeons and trials in Stormblood carry on the marked improvments that came with Heavensward and the trials in particular, such as those of Susano and Byakko, go so insanely hard. Stormblood also quickly sheds its one-note and focused themes for extremely nuanced and exciting political turmoil and utter chaos in its final acts, introduced in the later patches. These patches are incredible and are filled with amazing monologues, exciting new mysteries that unfold, experly constructed and dramatic cutscenes and battle sequences and my favourite part by far - the relationship that grows between the warrior of light and alisaie, these final quests made me fall in love with alisaie as a character and I felt genuinely crushed when she succumbed to the same fate as her brother and the other scions. The music in this part of the game, the constantly moving and chaotic nature of the story, the character development, all fantastic and it makes me so excited for shadowbringers so bring it on. Captain has freed Doma and Ala Mhigo but the real battle has only just begun!

Fuck this game and it's Wattpad fanfic-tier meta bullshit. They ruined Aerith's death.

I have finally completed ALL of the Mori Mori Slime games! As I predicted, the tank battles were the key new feature in the DS game, so this game is all on-foot(?) action stuff, but it has by far the best action parts of any of the Mori Mori Slime games. The bosses are silly and challenging, and you might even die once or twice figuring out their patterns. The game is very forgiving though, if you die. You just get sent back to town, and any resources you collected while you were out are sent back with you, so there's never any wasted effort :)

Being that there's no tank/ship battles, collecting monsters and items via the carts and rafts are far less important in this game than the others. They're largely just completionist cosmetic things back in your main town, as the items let you cosmetically fix up the town, and the monsters just hang around town like they do in the other games. There's no tank for them to be able to crew around in, sadly, but that's not really the game's fault of how good its successors were :P . The only big reason to explore and be vigilant are the fact that, very rarely, you can find life-fruit (right out of Dragon Quest) to extend your health bar, as well as all of the other villager slimes that you have to find to progress the game.

The story is very light-hearted and silly, just like the other games. It's just a little bit of a shame that Mihon and Surami (your Healie friend and little sister) are kidnapped for almost the entire game, because they're some of the best and funniest characters :/.

Verdict: Highly recommended. I have to assume there's an English patch for this game out there somewhere, so I can recommend it to a wider audience, as the GBA game itself is fairly difficult to find online (in my experience). This is a fantastic action game for GBA, and definitely one of my favorite adventure games on the system.

Though I thought very highly of Dead or Alive, my attempt to pinpoint when the 3D fighting game genre came into its own (or "got good" if you want me to be less polite) has now taken me a few months back to Soul Edge or Blade or whatever the hell you want to call it.

Soul Calibur and DOA are pretty much neck-and-neck for me, and whichever series I prefer changes with the weather. I was hoping that these initial releases would be different enough in terms of quality that I could easily point to one as being better, but it turns out this is not the case!

Sure, Soul Blade differentiates itself by focusing on weapons and even has a surprisingly robust story in the form of the very funnily named "Edge Master" mode, but I think I prefer the weight of Dead or Alive's characters and how that game paces combat. Soul Blade has a deeper combo system, but Dead or Alive is easier to pick up and play. Dead or Alive has jiggle physics, but Soul Blade has Voldo-- there's a lot to weigh here!

That said, Soul Blade released on consoles first, so for the purposes of my completely pointless experiment, it has DOA beat. I could take this back even further and try Tekken 2, but I've played the demo enough times already and I'm not especially impressed by how it feels. Look, it's a weak excuse, I know. I just need to free up some time so I can figure out how the hell you chain Taki's Critical Edge into an actual combo so Sophitia can stop beating the absolute piss out of me. Google is not being helpful, every old GameFaQs and Reddit thread I find basically just says "do it better." Do what better!? It's not in the manual! OH FUCK SOPHITIA IS RUNNING RIGHT AT M-

i've been thinking about my relationship with art, and my thoughts at the moment are that what i want in a piece is to feel something. it's not only about being entertaining, it's about catharsis. it's about feeling extremely happy or deeply miserable. it's about having the teeth grinding, the foot tapping, the head scratched. it's about going insane over the details. i want to feel alive. maybe it's a sick thought. maybe i should just live my own life, but i can guarantee, i've been living my own life a lot! much more than i would like to, sometimes.

all the games i've finished this year so far (very few) were a good time, some of them were amazing, really thought-provoking like anodyne 2, but none of them hit me like a truck. until GOD HAND.

GOD HAND makes you feel extremely happy, deeply miserable, with your teeth grinding, your foot tapping, your head scratching... pretty much at the same time! it's commonly known as a very difficult game and it's not an impossible one, but it does require you full commitment. starting with learning the controls: when action games were about swords and guns, with fast-paced movement, GOD HAND was about throwing punches while moving in tank controls. it's all about positioning, a 1v1 it's already a difficult task, but a 2v1? a 4v1? does not help when your crowd control movements are slow as hell! but don't be confused: GOD HAND is not a slow game! actually, if you can't keep up, you will pretty much ended up cooked lol, you have to adapt to the rhythm of the fight. it's all about learning and once you learn, it's about going wild.

and it's not a flashy game. you throw punches. real punches. punches that hit, than you can feel when it hits. GOD HAND it's a dudes rock game but every single dude is rocking on you (in a not-homosexual-way (unfortunately)), and you got rock on them instead. GOD HAND it's a videogame that loves action games. it's a videogame that recognizes the masculine archetypes about the action genre in overall media and at the same time it honors it and it also makes fun of it. GOD HAND is very "manly"! i mean, having blackjack and poker and dogs races as a way to make money makes me think that shinji mikami and the team are either the funniest guys ever or the most heteronormative of all time! and it's very funny either way.

what really matters is that GOD HAND is a videogame that made me feel everything, and in a year that is definitely NOT being my year, with a lot of work and study and personal problems as well, making me sometimes lost my interest in my favorite hobby, it reminds me how great videogames can be and how i can always just punch a son of a bitch when it needs to. you better watch out mf!!!

i honestly really hope this game gets a port/remake because there's something very special about it

it's sad that there's no way to play it on modern platforms without emulation