Very funny that the most mechanically-refined, forward-thinking, white-knuckle thrill-ride "proto-character action" beat-'em-up of all time has only been ported once: to an unwieldy, Capcom logo-shaped arcade pad.

The ultimate co-op Kirby experience, which at this point was basically co-op Smash Bros. The whole "you need to use that power on this obstacle" thing doesn't work with a four-player run, but it's good fun at least 90% of the time.

They did such a good job translating Tekken characters to an SF template and creating a world of charming art assets that you can almost forget its myriad horrible decisions (gems, Pandora, on-disc DLC).

An excellent tribute to the tough-as-nails arcade platformer, while still making some allowances for home play to make up for an extended runtime and a "true ending" reachable by playing on Hard mode only.

It's basically just a Greatest Hits compilation, which in this case is totally fine by me. The expanded soundtrack is amazing and the collectible cousins are neat. I'd spend my salary on a Katamari cousins gachapon.

Arc System Works does Contra, which means it looks amazing but has weird RPG elements? There is an arcade mode, but the game doesn't feel balanced around it. It's still a lot of fun, with crazy multi-phase bosses and so on.

I adore the atmosphere, stage designs, storytelling, basic combat, pretty much everything. My only real complaint is that this didn't need RPG stats/mechanics; their presence contributes to the lack of build/weapon variety.

After years of seeing it hyped to high heaven I sat down to play it and honestly really enjoyed myself. It's not a masterpiece of balancing or whatever but it's clear that a lot of love and consideration went into it all.

As a Simpsons game it's visually quite faithful and good-looking, even if it rarely nails the humor of the show. As a beat-'em-up it's dumb shallow fun that gets a lot better in co-op. Pretty goofy final boss.

It's Galaga, but they made the aliens cute and the backgrounds pretty. There's an end-stage now, and multiple endings based on performance. Love the cocktail-jazz tune that plays when you lose. That's Galactic Dancin'

It's nice when there is a game that everyone has played by virtue of its ubiquitousness, like this or Pokémon Go. When I was in middle school the existence of Chrome Dino was kind of a schoolyard secret: "Did you know... ?"

Inconsistent AI makes it feel like chaos in single-player, but it's a novel and fun multi-player proposal, a tactical 1v1 take on the shmup clearly inspired by match-puzzle games. The kind of thing I could feasibly get into.

It's a slightly older game than I thought, so I can forgive it being a bit ugly and muddy considering that the Conan-esque setting is pretty cool. Still it's a rather cheap and annoying beat-'em-up, not my favorite.

Irem-tier handsome shmup with unique, deliberate pacing and multi-directional shooting. The submarine premise makes for some clever setups. I wish I had a bomb, though, and that big-ass sub hitbox can really be a pain.

The measly attack range and minimal moveset make it a pretty dull beat-'em-up, but I have to give it points for the acid-storybook presentation and the very silly score system, which involves turning enemies into chickens.