Cakewalking
680 Reviews liked by Cakewalking
I played this in a group and it was entirely us just screaming "oh my god what is wrong with this bird?!" and at one point an animal she was thinking of was "human" and anyway it's the best game of all time.
Genuinely fun, well-translated, cute, and frustrating (but in a good way) as you try to fend off the oomfies from interrupting your conversation with an idiot who occasionally gaslights you.
There's some minor gripes that can come from not knowing the wordlist at play, but any frustrations can be chalked up to Okuu being an absolute birdbrain who forgets that the animal youkai that came to visit was a human or that someone wanted to build a prison next to your mansion.
There's some minor gripes that can come from not knowing the wordlist at play, but any frustrations can be chalked up to Okuu being an absolute birdbrain who forgets that the animal youkai that came to visit was a human or that someone wanted to build a prison next to your mansion.
goes hard
Marvel's Spider-Man
2018
I'm home sick and I played this all day, but I don't think I'll play it tomorrow. It is the oatmeal of video games. As oatmeals go it's tasty enough, but it's never going to be anything more than bland and homogeneous. Also this particular oatmeal adores cops and the surveillance state to an absurd degree.
That metaphor got away from me.
That metaphor got away from me.
Marvelous duality to everything here. The story from the ground up is my shit, with the world surrounding Jack being a perilous shell of other FF games bereft of context as we are complete strangers to this place, both textually and metatextually. Haunting, unfeeling, then recontextualized at last in the end to these ghosts looking towards Paradise we say a mighty fuck you to. And on the other side, probably the most frustratingly dull interior and exterior for the vast vast majority of its time spent playing.
I'm not one to give props to being "intentionally" sludge, as in, I wanted to buy that maybe this gripping sense that Team Ninja simply Did Not Give a single SHIT past what they were asked to is an Intentional choice. But no I really think it brings everything down, as much as emulating the FF feel is nice the "variety" is genuinely smokescreen. Options between classes blend together real quick without much uniqueness to them, even with a kinesthetically sound toolset to all of them too much boils together into tedium. In hindsight, part of this is my fault for playing Monster Hunter at the same time as this, which pretty much takes the uh, for the sake of levity let's call it the 'soulsborne' system of whiff punishing, to an actually fantastic conclusion. Even beyond that though, somebody else mentioned it that, Nioh was never THIS bad. Nioh was never THIS tiring and boring. Even when upping the difficulty to hard and losing the party assist (which, tbh, i never used it anyway but needed to take away the temptation), things formulate too much together. The most praiseworthy aspect of the design is in its bosses but even that comes with a lot of caveats, as so many of them, almost all of them really, limit themselves with their pre-ordained telegraphing. In that the purple-orange-red system is bluntly, a fucked system that pretty much lowers the ceiling tremendously on what a boss's attacks and moves are capable of!!! After Tiamat the game might as well have ended, because once my head entered the rhythm that is how to respond to every single one of these attacks, nothing else ever puts a wrench in it.
Additionally, this project could not have had less caring hands on it for the lead-up to those final couple hours. Not so much in a budgetary way, but more so in a "this is a first draft, and it shows!!!" Found myself a lot of the time script doctoring how I could've paced so many of these elements better, because there's so little to emotionally buy into. And no it's not like that Is the idea, the last hour or so is absolutely riding on that payoff ludicrously.
So, something something duality, two teams who conceptually MAY have been a match made in heaven rather turned the whole thing into a smushed together crust that formulates only barely by the strength of some of its parts rather than the sum. I don't know, I really do love high concept stuff, I really really really really love Nomura's markings and pullings here, the futurism and its cracks and Jack's very multifaceted awakening! Maybe my standards have simply been put too high to accept a very good story told super terribly. I wanted to be floored, I was rooting and hollering for Jack but he just said meh and walked off. And you know what, I somehow enjoyed this a good deal overall.
So good for him, good for him. Respect.
I'm not one to give props to being "intentionally" sludge, as in, I wanted to buy that maybe this gripping sense that Team Ninja simply Did Not Give a single SHIT past what they were asked to is an Intentional choice. But no I really think it brings everything down, as much as emulating the FF feel is nice the "variety" is genuinely smokescreen. Options between classes blend together real quick without much uniqueness to them, even with a kinesthetically sound toolset to all of them too much boils together into tedium. In hindsight, part of this is my fault for playing Monster Hunter at the same time as this, which pretty much takes the uh, for the sake of levity let's call it the 'soulsborne' system of whiff punishing, to an actually fantastic conclusion. Even beyond that though, somebody else mentioned it that, Nioh was never THIS bad. Nioh was never THIS tiring and boring. Even when upping the difficulty to hard and losing the party assist (which, tbh, i never used it anyway but needed to take away the temptation), things formulate too much together. The most praiseworthy aspect of the design is in its bosses but even that comes with a lot of caveats, as so many of them, almost all of them really, limit themselves with their pre-ordained telegraphing. In that the purple-orange-red system is bluntly, a fucked system that pretty much lowers the ceiling tremendously on what a boss's attacks and moves are capable of!!! After Tiamat the game might as well have ended, because once my head entered the rhythm that is how to respond to every single one of these attacks, nothing else ever puts a wrench in it.
Additionally, this project could not have had less caring hands on it for the lead-up to those final couple hours. Not so much in a budgetary way, but more so in a "this is a first draft, and it shows!!!" Found myself a lot of the time script doctoring how I could've paced so many of these elements better, because there's so little to emotionally buy into. And no it's not like that Is the idea, the last hour or so is absolutely riding on that payoff ludicrously.
So, something something duality, two teams who conceptually MAY have been a match made in heaven rather turned the whole thing into a smushed together crust that formulates only barely by the strength of some of its parts rather than the sum. I don't know, I really do love high concept stuff, I really really really really love Nomura's markings and pullings here, the futurism and its cracks and Jack's very multifaceted awakening! Maybe my standards have simply been put too high to accept a very good story told super terribly. I wanted to be floored, I was rooting and hollering for Jack but he just said meh and walked off. And you know what, I somehow enjoyed this a good deal overall.
So good for him, good for him. Respect.
This review contains spoilers
Took me over a year of on and off playing to finally beat this fucker. I truly cannot stand this game but also I appreciate it. It is the weirdest game because I truly felt no emotional attachment or connection with the game until like the final hour. That final stretch is where all the actually cool concepts of the game are allowed a bit more room to breath and have actual meaningful implications. However I think these interesting concepts still just come out half baked.
90% of the reasoning for this is Rex. I don't dislike Rex, I don't mind the voice direction too much (it becomes funny once you give in to it), and his optimism and kindness is actually sometimes maybe kind of endearing. But mannnn I feel like he is not at all given enough development for the kind of significance he is given as the PRIMARY MORAL AGENT of the story. To elaborate, Rex's ultimate victories by the end of the game over Pyra/Mythra, Jin, Malos and the Architect are primarily philosophical, he shows EVERYONE a new way to live. I SIMPLY DO NOT BUY THIS AS THE PLAYER LOL. All the aforementioned characters have lived for hundreds (and in some cases thousands) of years. For Pyra/Mythra and Malos I can appreciate that its about meeting the right person and the right time, and the intensity of Rex's optimism compensates for the relatively short blip he represents on their lifetime, sure. However, Rex's ideals are not developed in the slightest, nor is Rex really himself. Why is Rex such a great person? Because he just is (and his home village was sweet). Why does he have such an immense faith in humanity? Because he meets nice people and just sort of does. To clarify, these are not issues in isolation. I actually quite love how Rex's base optimism inspires Pyra/Mythra to reconsider their views on their self worth. However when the endgame (which is the only part of the story that truly engaged me to think) revolves around Rex's (NOT THE PARTIES) answer to the grand question of the future of mankind I truly just to not buy it. His thoughts and ideology aren't honed through opposition and introspective reconsideration, they just always exist, and he faces no marked, longing crisis that could warrant some reflection and development of these thoughts. This especially feels notable to me when Rex has philosophical exchanges with the antagonists. I really never feel like Rex actually wins any of these verbal bouts, pretty much every time the villains just sort of fold like lawn chairs to the general sentiment of Rex's consistent abrasive optimism. Which again is fine? But I wish the game would maybe steer away from Rex's fucking views on the worthiness of mankind and instead just keep in inline as someone who believes in the redemption of the villains or something.
I emphasise the focus on Rex's views here because the parties are essentially irrelevant, the game doesnt really care what Morag, Zeke, Nia and Tora think by the end, its Rex's answer that matters and quite frankly I find that answer completely lacking. Also I think the party dynamic was weak. The optional blades are also horribly implemented (you only get to experience the beginning of their stories after spending like 2 hours with them at minimum????), but 80% of their designs blow ass so you never even want to consider using them.
Also the scene direction and pacing in this game is fucking atrocious. Most scenes have like no clear directorial intent except to seemingly drag the scene on for as long as possible and to make dialogue feel awkward. I cannot believe that some of the endgame cutscene sequences actually made the final cut it is unreal how sloppy some of them are. When you realise just how much time you waste in this game just through sloppy cutscene direction alone you will STRUGGLE to beat this motherfucker, not even to mention all the terrible filler(ish) plotlines that made the cut (I want tora to be left crucified in the depths of the Mariana trench). What's even more horrible is that some scenes are actually directed amazingly, and have the peak story moments to accompany them, which somehow just makes it more annoying overall? If you're gonna be shit at least let me whip my phone out whenever I see a cutscene starting ffs (only half joking here.)
Also it is truly comical how bad the tutorials in this game are. This it's actually a miracle of technology this could be invented.
Still the fact that the endgame even warranted me to think about these things (and actually emotionally compelled me with Amalthus/Jin/Malos) is worth credit in my eyes regardless.
Also I hated the combat and world design. Field skills can eat my ass, sidequests are unbelievably roadblock filled and convoluted, and enemy placement was designed by expert CIA torturers gone game devs.
I gave it 2.5 stars and im clueless as to why but I think the sheer abrasion of the game got to me eventually. Maybe its just Stockholm Syndrome.
90% of the reasoning for this is Rex. I don't dislike Rex, I don't mind the voice direction too much (it becomes funny once you give in to it), and his optimism and kindness is actually sometimes maybe kind of endearing. But mannnn I feel like he is not at all given enough development for the kind of significance he is given as the PRIMARY MORAL AGENT of the story. To elaborate, Rex's ultimate victories by the end of the game over Pyra/Mythra, Jin, Malos and the Architect are primarily philosophical, he shows EVERYONE a new way to live. I SIMPLY DO NOT BUY THIS AS THE PLAYER LOL. All the aforementioned characters have lived for hundreds (and in some cases thousands) of years. For Pyra/Mythra and Malos I can appreciate that its about meeting the right person and the right time, and the intensity of Rex's optimism compensates for the relatively short blip he represents on their lifetime, sure. However, Rex's ideals are not developed in the slightest, nor is Rex really himself. Why is Rex such a great person? Because he just is (and his home village was sweet). Why does he have such an immense faith in humanity? Because he meets nice people and just sort of does. To clarify, these are not issues in isolation. I actually quite love how Rex's base optimism inspires Pyra/Mythra to reconsider their views on their self worth. However when the endgame (which is the only part of the story that truly engaged me to think) revolves around Rex's (NOT THE PARTIES) answer to the grand question of the future of mankind I truly just to not buy it. His thoughts and ideology aren't honed through opposition and introspective reconsideration, they just always exist, and he faces no marked, longing crisis that could warrant some reflection and development of these thoughts. This especially feels notable to me when Rex has philosophical exchanges with the antagonists. I really never feel like Rex actually wins any of these verbal bouts, pretty much every time the villains just sort of fold like lawn chairs to the general sentiment of Rex's consistent abrasive optimism. Which again is fine? But I wish the game would maybe steer away from Rex's fucking views on the worthiness of mankind and instead just keep in inline as someone who believes in the redemption of the villains or something.
I emphasise the focus on Rex's views here because the parties are essentially irrelevant, the game doesnt really care what Morag, Zeke, Nia and Tora think by the end, its Rex's answer that matters and quite frankly I find that answer completely lacking. Also I think the party dynamic was weak. The optional blades are also horribly implemented (you only get to experience the beginning of their stories after spending like 2 hours with them at minimum????), but 80% of their designs blow ass so you never even want to consider using them.
Also the scene direction and pacing in this game is fucking atrocious. Most scenes have like no clear directorial intent except to seemingly drag the scene on for as long as possible and to make dialogue feel awkward. I cannot believe that some of the endgame cutscene sequences actually made the final cut it is unreal how sloppy some of them are. When you realise just how much time you waste in this game just through sloppy cutscene direction alone you will STRUGGLE to beat this motherfucker, not even to mention all the terrible filler(ish) plotlines that made the cut (I want tora to be left crucified in the depths of the Mariana trench). What's even more horrible is that some scenes are actually directed amazingly, and have the peak story moments to accompany them, which somehow just makes it more annoying overall? If you're gonna be shit at least let me whip my phone out whenever I see a cutscene starting ffs (only half joking here.)
Also it is truly comical how bad the tutorials in this game are. This it's actually a miracle of technology this could be invented.
Still the fact that the endgame even warranted me to think about these things (and actually emotionally compelled me with Amalthus/Jin/Malos) is worth credit in my eyes regardless.
Also I hated the combat and world design. Field skills can eat my ass, sidequests are unbelievably roadblock filled and convoluted, and enemy placement was designed by expert CIA torturers gone game devs.
I gave it 2.5 stars and im clueless as to why but I think the sheer abrasion of the game got to me eventually. Maybe its just Stockholm Syndrome.
Xenoblade Chronicles
2010
I'm going to do something nightmarish and probably go and play (and MAYBE finish) XCX and XC2 before playing 3. I have no intention of replaying 1 and potentially invalidating a lot of my thoughts on it, because it does have issues.
The thrust of the main conceit largely centered around halfway through the narrative is dumb, for one. The whole both sidesy conclusion Shulk comes to with, ahem, "the big bad", is tacky if not downright callous treatment/response to the direct concentration camp theming laid out beforehand. Which leaves a genuinely bad set of things to just have in your head towards the finale when it gets largely spiritual. Granted, when I played this, my brain was fucking off, and that was a blessing in disguise.
Simultaneously, it's hard for me to really really hate. Even if things don't fit together, playing this on a dingy Wii in the late hours of night back from school was borderline transcendental because Xenoblade is just so pretty top to bottom. I love how everything looks, sounds, and feels, from exploring the secret areas of Eryth Sea, to the beautiful serenity of Satorl Marsh, it's lovely. In a way it is a "first mmo" experience in that respect, at least nailing what the mmo is supposed to capture in that sense of awe and scale. Something I wouldn't ever quite feel the same way again in an rpg. Even FFXIV which I still play religiously barely scratches at that side of the surface.
I also love the cast, they're so beautifully characterized, largely by the VA which at some points just carry the whole thing. I don't think there's very many people who can quite belt a scream like Shulk's Adam Howden out there and make it work, you know? It's because of that there's a genuine memetic quality to it that spreads out and surrounds the game with a lot of heart. That side of the text is also moderately kept, there's a lot of moments where the cast just gets to sit down and talk and those moments speak louder than the bombastic messy parts it gets to.
In a way I often liken Xenoblade Chronicles to Chrono Trigger. Practically rips off its whole idea of structuring its story really, there's very similar downtimes and pacing. I'd argue both don't really speak to larger themes either, both impart that unique "epic"ness through playing it, and vibes and energy are a core part of being strung along. CT certainly isn't as messy but neither does it really hit the same highs XC1 gives me. Ah, the point of the comparison though is that I think XC1 genuinely pays true on what the CT intro does. That rip-roaring 2 minute intro with the pendulum swinging through that embarks your journey? Xenoblade Chronicles does that same feel in its own way before expanding beyond that, becoming something much larger and visceral. So massive and sweeping me off my feet that with my feet high above the clouds I neglect to look at the ground below at all to see how it is.
That's magical. It's what adventure and journey can really impart. Whether or not the lessons in here are even worth discussing (they're not) I'll cherish those holy-shit-that's-a-lot-of-hours it gave me.
The thrust of the main conceit largely centered around halfway through the narrative is dumb, for one. The whole both sidesy conclusion Shulk comes to with, ahem, "the big bad", is tacky if not downright callous treatment/response to the direct concentration camp theming laid out beforehand. Which leaves a genuinely bad set of things to just have in your head towards the finale when it gets largely spiritual. Granted, when I played this, my brain was fucking off, and that was a blessing in disguise.
Simultaneously, it's hard for me to really really hate. Even if things don't fit together, playing this on a dingy Wii in the late hours of night back from school was borderline transcendental because Xenoblade is just so pretty top to bottom. I love how everything looks, sounds, and feels, from exploring the secret areas of Eryth Sea, to the beautiful serenity of Satorl Marsh, it's lovely. In a way it is a "first mmo" experience in that respect, at least nailing what the mmo is supposed to capture in that sense of awe and scale. Something I wouldn't ever quite feel the same way again in an rpg. Even FFXIV which I still play religiously barely scratches at that side of the surface.
I also love the cast, they're so beautifully characterized, largely by the VA which at some points just carry the whole thing. I don't think there's very many people who can quite belt a scream like Shulk's Adam Howden out there and make it work, you know? It's because of that there's a genuine memetic quality to it that spreads out and surrounds the game with a lot of heart. That side of the text is also moderately kept, there's a lot of moments where the cast just gets to sit down and talk and those moments speak louder than the bombastic messy parts it gets to.
In a way I often liken Xenoblade Chronicles to Chrono Trigger. Practically rips off its whole idea of structuring its story really, there's very similar downtimes and pacing. I'd argue both don't really speak to larger themes either, both impart that unique "epic"ness through playing it, and vibes and energy are a core part of being strung along. CT certainly isn't as messy but neither does it really hit the same highs XC1 gives me. Ah, the point of the comparison though is that I think XC1 genuinely pays true on what the CT intro does. That rip-roaring 2 minute intro with the pendulum swinging through that embarks your journey? Xenoblade Chronicles does that same feel in its own way before expanding beyond that, becoming something much larger and visceral. So massive and sweeping me off my feet that with my feet high above the clouds I neglect to look at the ground below at all to see how it is.
That's magical. It's what adventure and journey can really impart. Whether or not the lessons in here are even worth discussing (they're not) I'll cherish those holy-shit-that's-a-lot-of-hours it gave me.
Super Mario 64
1996
(5-year-old's review, typed by her dad)
You get to go on a slide and at the end you gotta beat Bowser, because you get to MOVE and MOVE if there's turns, and also there's a slide in the snowy place!
[Dad's note: She would use the Wii U gamepad to go do the secret slide in Peach's Castle over and over again, every day for the entire summer of 2020]
You get to go on a slide and at the end you gotta beat Bowser, because you get to MOVE and MOVE if there's turns, and also there's a slide in the snowy place!
[Dad's note: She would use the Wii U gamepad to go do the secret slide in Peach's Castle over and over again, every day for the entire summer of 2020]
Ubisoft's MVCI to 3DO's UMVC3; it's certainly a lot more tactical and deeper than HOMM3 but loses out on alot of the simplicity, replayability, and aesthetics that made HOMM3/HOTA a timeless classic. 5.5 Mod is super necessary to address AI loads and other balance changes but brings with it some unnecessary system overhauls and difficulty increases like all overhaul mods these days. Still you would be totally remiss to write this off as a lesser version of HoMM3, if you get your kicks off on build synergies, impactful early game decision-making, and clever mechanical exploits this should be your jam.
Elite Beat Agents
2006
My friends told me to go get some bitches so I asked the elite beat agents for help but all they did was dance to clown music for 3 minutes then left
Elite Beat Agents
2006
There are ways in which this is slightly flawed as a rhythm game or whatever, but it is just not acceptable to complain about stuff like that in this case. Sorry. Magical, joyful game. It gets every pass possible. Soundtrack that on paper seems ridiculous but somehow works PERFECTLY. An avalanche of goofy PG-rated anime gags that might seem cloying or tired after a while, but no, charming as fuck, no matter how long you play. Honestly, I just wish there was more of it - there are nineteen songs and I think that if there was even one more I might have given this a perfect.
Hello everyone my name is Mr. Cinemasins and this is EVERYTHING WRONG WITH SF5 STORY MODE:
- Necalli is presented as an 'unstopable life form' but loses every single fight in the story.
- Kolin is shown to have healing powers instead of ice.
- Rashid wins against Chun-Li.
- Urien isn't bothered at all that Kolin betrayed his trust bringing Nash in.
- Chun-Li knows who's Sean before Third Strike.
- Laura's portuguese accent is not from Rio de Janeiro.
- Laura wins against Ken.
- Ed uses telekinesis via pyscho powers (not even Bison is capable of this).
- Alex wins against Dhalsim.
- Nash, whom Guilte admired so much as to copying his entire fighting style, only exchange one 'hello' after he's ressurected.
- Both Ibuki and R. Mika win against Balrog and Ed together at different points, while Zangief loses.
- One of the dolls is racist against Birdie while speaking french.
- Seth's entire existence as a returning dlc character contradicts this story's ending.
And my personal favorite:
- Juri goes from Rio de Janeiro to London via motorcycle, while also carrying Cammy and Decapre, in less than a day.
- Necalli is presented as an 'unstopable life form' but loses every single fight in the story.
- Kolin is shown to have healing powers instead of ice.
- Rashid wins against Chun-Li.
- Urien isn't bothered at all that Kolin betrayed his trust bringing Nash in.
- Chun-Li knows who's Sean before Third Strike.
- Laura's portuguese accent is not from Rio de Janeiro.
- Laura wins against Ken.
- Ed uses telekinesis via pyscho powers (not even Bison is capable of this).
- Alex wins against Dhalsim.
- Nash, whom Guilte admired so much as to copying his entire fighting style, only exchange one 'hello' after he's ressurected.
- Both Ibuki and R. Mika win against Balrog and Ed together at different points, while Zangief loses.
- One of the dolls is racist against Birdie while speaking french.
- Seth's entire existence as a returning dlc character contradicts this story's ending.
And my personal favorite:
- Juri goes from Rio de Janeiro to London via motorcycle, while also carrying Cammy and Decapre, in less than a day.
Mega Man Legends
1997
DeAndre Cortez Way’s 2009 critique of Braid is well known for how it pioneered games analysis on Youtube, but it’s even more famous for its assertion that the game lacked central purpose. While entertainment is generally associated with some degree of pointlessness, there’s also expected to be some degree of enrichment, whether that be through the merit of competition, mastering challenge, or constructive escapism. If the audience is left without a lasting impression, the experience may as well have never happened, so it’s important for games to construct purposefulness, regardless of how artificial it is.
I started reevaluating this concept when Roll called me up as I exited a dungeon, mentioning that I must be getting hungry, and that I could have a slice of the apricot pie she baked as soon as I got back to the ship. The line is completely pointless. The subject never comes up again, it doesn’t build into any new characterization, and the game would be functionally identical without it, but even so, they went to the trouble of writing and recording a voice line for it. Similarly, while Roll is established as your mechanic, she’s not the person who saves your game and heals you, it’s a small robotic monkey that constantly does The Monkey like Johnny Bravo, and I can’t fathom why. That is to say, I can’t fathom why it’s constantly dancing and I also can’t fathom why it was included in the game at all, but there it is. The more I looked for it, the more I noticed how Legends is completely saturated with pointlessness, including its plot. The stakes are incredibly low, you’re simply trying to find a treasure before the Bonne Family Pirates do, but they’re such a loving family of good-natured criminals that you wouldn’t mind them winning. In multiple cutscenes, MegaMan seems like he wants to communicate to the Bonnes that there’s no real reason to fight, but they keep doing it because they love it. Details like these give the game a totally unique atmosphere of joyous pointlessness, like the developers themselves were building the game in ways that made them laugh, regardless of how much sense their design actually made. The game feels like a celebration of doing things entirely for their own sake, and not getting too caught up in finding a grand purpose. I wouldn’t exactly call it The Myth of Sisyphus for kids or anything, but at the very least it’s a perfect example of how pleasant it can be that there ain’t no point to the game.
I started reevaluating this concept when Roll called me up as I exited a dungeon, mentioning that I must be getting hungry, and that I could have a slice of the apricot pie she baked as soon as I got back to the ship. The line is completely pointless. The subject never comes up again, it doesn’t build into any new characterization, and the game would be functionally identical without it, but even so, they went to the trouble of writing and recording a voice line for it. Similarly, while Roll is established as your mechanic, she’s not the person who saves your game and heals you, it’s a small robotic monkey that constantly does The Monkey like Johnny Bravo, and I can’t fathom why. That is to say, I can’t fathom why it’s constantly dancing and I also can’t fathom why it was included in the game at all, but there it is. The more I looked for it, the more I noticed how Legends is completely saturated with pointlessness, including its plot. The stakes are incredibly low, you’re simply trying to find a treasure before the Bonne Family Pirates do, but they’re such a loving family of good-natured criminals that you wouldn’t mind them winning. In multiple cutscenes, MegaMan seems like he wants to communicate to the Bonnes that there’s no real reason to fight, but they keep doing it because they love it. Details like these give the game a totally unique atmosphere of joyous pointlessness, like the developers themselves were building the game in ways that made them laugh, regardless of how much sense their design actually made. The game feels like a celebration of doing things entirely for their own sake, and not getting too caught up in finding a grand purpose. I wouldn’t exactly call it The Myth of Sisyphus for kids or anything, but at the very least it’s a perfect example of how pleasant it can be that there ain’t no point to the game.
Action 52
1991
The Definitive Action 52 tier list
SSS: Micro Mike, Ooze, Storm Over the Desert
SS: Mash Man, Fuzz Power, Non-Human, Streemerz
S: Slashers, Timewarp, Meong, Haunted Hill, Ninja Assault
A: Star Evil, Bubblegum Rosy, Underground, Crazy Shuffle, City of Doom
B: Dedant, Illuminator, Space Dreams, Evil Empire, Chill Out, Manchester
C: Alfredo, Dam Busters, Robbie Robot, Thrusters, Megalonia, Cry Baby, Bits n Pieces, They Came...
D: Operation Full Moon, French Baker, Silver Sword, Lollipop, Sombreros, Hambo, Jigsaw, Star Breathers
E: Lazer League, G-Force Fighters, Billy Bob, Jupiter Score, Atmos Quake, Boss
F: Beeps n Blips, Rocket Jockey, Spread Fire, Sharks, Critical Bypass, Shooting Gallery
Think I forgot one🤔...
SSS: Micro Mike, Ooze, Storm Over the Desert
SS: Mash Man, Fuzz Power, Non-Human, Streemerz
S: Slashers, Timewarp, Meong, Haunted Hill, Ninja Assault
A: Star Evil, Bubblegum Rosy, Underground, Crazy Shuffle, City of Doom
B: Dedant, Illuminator, Space Dreams, Evil Empire, Chill Out, Manchester
C: Alfredo, Dam Busters, Robbie Robot, Thrusters, Megalonia, Cry Baby, Bits n Pieces, They Came...
D: Operation Full Moon, French Baker, Silver Sword, Lollipop, Sombreros, Hambo, Jigsaw, Star Breathers
E: Lazer League, G-Force Fighters, Billy Bob, Jupiter Score, Atmos Quake, Boss
F: Beeps n Blips, Rocket Jockey, Spread Fire, Sharks, Critical Bypass, Shooting Gallery
Think I forgot one🤔...
Owlboy
2016
feel like i have to intro every single scathing review of an indie game with "gosh i sure hate being this guy but". but we must be honest. this game is extremely boring. it's mechanically subpar for a modern metroidvania (controling yourself in midair is loosey-goosey, there are no maps or warps, and lord forgive me if i find the progression system in this game to be underwhelming). why do indie games keep trying to have an epic story and characters. i think games need to stop trying to tell stories explicitly and instead tell implicit stories rooted in experience. make your game fun and/or engaging, or don't bother.