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This review contains spoilers

"Tell this asshole if he wants to learn how to (re)make my product (game), he's gotta do it my way, the right way!" - Jesse Pinkman

Persona 3 Reload is ultimately a barely passable remake of what I consider the greatest game ever made. I find a large amount of the game’s flaws go ignored among the myriad conveniences the game adds, but they make the game feel like something of a hollow shell of what it used to be.

This can be seen in every aspect of the game, from the very beginning, It’s been well documented already, but the atmosphere that was dripping from the animated cutscenes of the original is completely absent. The opening scene that disorients you, makes you feel as if nothing is as it should be, is replaced with Persona 5 cutscene.mp4. It conveys the story, and that’s all it does – it’s an extension of the same flaws that purveyed Portable. This is an unfortunate trend, as in taking a variety of elements from a game that already seemed to fundamentally misunderstand the source material, it worsens it further. It draws worthless lines from portable that are only there to compensate for a lack of visuals, adds menial things like Junpei’s perversion joke in the train scene, and most offensive, adds the Portable exclusive scene after Minato returns from the final battle. Where the original cut directly from Aigis crying to 3/5, the group now have to announce their individual reactions, turning one of the most beautifully poignant scenes in the game into something standard, dull, and thoughtless.

The modern sheen the game has feels like a coat of paint that hides Reload being a fundamentally worse, less cohesive piece of art than the original. The lighting in the dorm is ruined, draining the atmosphere from one of the most prominent and beloved locations in the game. The dramatic, perfectly framed lighting of the Nyx fight (conveyed acutely in the dancing game) is replaced with…pure green, as is thoughtlessly thrown at every other dark hour scene in the game, which betrays a total lack of thought or care, and makes the game feel like a total rush job. The Orpheus awakening scene, previously a definitive tone setter that acts as the most striking piece of imagery and sound design in the series, can now only be described as underwhelming. Most to all of the little animations the models would enact that made SEES feel so well characterised and alive are absent – and why? For all the bells and whistles the game feels like a sanded down version of what was ultimately a very small-scale game.

Most script changes feel thoughtless and for the worse, making many lines less impactful for no good reason – I can appreciate the attempt to provide a more accurate script to the Japanese version, and this works in some cases, but scenes like Akihiko’s awakening are betrayed by this. Nearly every line change here feels like it lessens the impact of the scene, with worse framing to boot. This is demonstrative of a fundamental lack of understanding of the original that can be seen in the worsening of Akihiko’s character, now adjusted and simplified to be more like his P4U counterpart, one of the most horribly flanderised depictions of a character that I’ve ever seen. I don’t know why anyone on the team thought this was a good idea. Most of the cast do not suffer as much as Akihiko does, but characters like Mitsuru do to a lesser extent, with traits being further emphasised to fit into molds that have been further solidified since the release of the original. One of my favourite scenes in the game is the meeting on the roof between Minato and Junpei, acting as a perfect capstone to one of the most well-thought-out arcs and dynamics in the original game. In reload, it gets replaced with a relatively generic feeling scene between the second-year trio, for seemingly no reason – Junpei does have a link episode that I assume was meant to compensate, but it fails entirely to capture what made that scene great and ends up totally forgettable.

Nearly all of the music is definitively worse – there are highlights, such as the new remix of changing seasons, but the majority have a strangely amateur quality, with the mixing feeling frequently unprofessional. Much of the instrumentals lose all of the impact they once had and Mass Destruction is infamous for this, but for me the worst example of it is in Iwatodai Dorm. I do admittedly love the new vocals, but they can’t save how poor the rest of it sounds. What makes this even more confusing is that all of the original songs are incredible, with Colour Your Night being one of my favourite songs in the franchise, an issue that I can only imagine was from trying to hard to be different from what was already perfect.

Lastly I’ll bring up where I think the game shines – a few key areas that I think fail to elevate the overall package. The combat is wonderfully fun and fluid, and I think theurgies are a satisfactory evolution of the showtime mechanic, but this is undercut by how ludicrously easy the game becomes with barely any effort, an issue that extends to even merciless. While the original was ultimately not a hard game, Reload becomes essentially thoughtless if you know what you’re doing. The combat animations are one of my favourite things the game does, with the way each character shifts to the other never getting tiresome, conveying their personalities and dynamics perfectly. Another is a few of the new character pieces added – I think the game massively elevates Shinjiro and Ken, the tragedy of both characters being emphasised in a way that only makes them more compelling, and Ryoji especially benefits from the greater degree of screentime Reload gives him. I’m glad the bond between him and Minato is now firmly grounded in a version other than the movies.

Personally, I think Persona 3 Reload is a disappointment, and not because it fails to be the “definitive” version many begrudged it for not being. It misunderstands, ignores and discards much of what made the original great, and it fails in aspects I could have never anticipated it would; I think the way the original uniquely excels deserves to be recognised. I still like the game overall, because the skeleton is one of my favourite things ever. But if I had to choose between Reload’s existence and a simple port of FES that bumped up the framerate, it would be an incredibly easy choice; a game that feels so deliberate against a pale imitation.


COME TO REBIRTH WE GOT THE

- 1 gorillion animation dollar budget
- industry standard setters of cutscenes and environments
- ....
- the worst act of the original game
- far cry tower
- far cry outpost
- far cry crafting
- open world with movement worse than zelda on the n64
- seriously, it's like ps1 tomb raider
- 3(!!) great chapters
- 11 uhhh other chapters
- story reliant on having played evercrisis and the free to play mobile battle royale????
- nojima 😡😡😡
- at least 3 hours spent in the materia menu
- the same bosses you fought in remake 3 times, 3 times
- the worst fucking minigames you've ever touched
- all the most annoying characters from anywhere else in the extended series
- benches?
- every action or animation locking you in for several extra unnecessary seconds
- shipbait
- tifa and aerith randomly deciding to act like harem anime characters for like 2 cutscenes
- fans who only read the title of the game and gave 5 stars on release date (all your reviews and ratings should be deleted)
- cait sith...?
- filler filler boat filler filler filler
- michael bay audio mixing
- bloated combat
- the sphere grid for some reason (but worse)
- "ahh cloud-kun you nearly touched mmy l-l-l-lips baka" yuffie
- crate puzzles you solve in 3 seconds and then spend 3 minutes doing

This is not the worst game I ever played, but it might be the most disappointed I've ever been going blind into a sequel of a game I liked. Before leaving a comment, please read the "Common Copes (CC)" section below. Thanks in advance.

COMMON COPES

C: But the original also had this many mini-games!
A: That was a shit part of the original too.

C: But the original also had this much filler!
A: That was shit too.

C: But in the original you also had to fiddle this much with materia!
A: That was also shit. Please just be normal and don't say all these silly things

C: I think this game is awesome man!
A: You must have Gone Gaga!

CLOSING THOUGHTS

If this kind of Ubisoft remake happened to my favorite RPG my only review would be a LiveLeak video.

At some point in the future, I really ought to write a great deal more about this duology, but having just completed my revisit I wanted to voice my initial thoughts. Whether or not I prefer certain aspects of Ocarina to this game, whether or not I resonated with one half more than the other, or whatever other gripes and nitpicks I have - as a conclusive, consecutive whole piece, that is both halves of this duology combined, I believe the Nintendo 64 Zelda duology very well may be Nintendo's magnum opus.

The Ocarina pairing carry themselves with a certain sophistication and solemness rarely felt in the company's other titles. What I felt these games have to say about the passing of time, of childhood innocence warped and cast aside, the process of growing up and the relationships, expressions and experiences that carry us through to adulthood... that's the sort of magic that this group of creatives was capable of in this era. The sort of knowing adoration poured into this duology, into Mario 64 and into MOTHER2. It's Nintendo at their absolute peak, and I don't want to get into my displeasure with the company as they stand and have stood for years now here... I simply want to commend them and express my gratitude for this two-headed beast, this totemic work of human expression they took the Nintendo 64 to its limits to produce. I'm not the Nintendo fan I was as a kid... far from it. But during those moments in Ocarina and Majora... yeah. I believe.

I think a term commonly associated with romance/sol animanga and games is “wish fulfillment.” Now, from my experience, it's a term usually met with some level of disdain or condescension. “Wow what a loser, they need this thing to feel good about themselves.” And, sure, I can understand where that attitude comes from, in fact I'm like that sometimes too. But I feel it's not that simple. People come from different backgrounds, places, and circumstances. Sometimes what we need is comfort from something, even if it isn't real.
Clannad, among many, many other beloved visual novels is boiled down to the common “your friends and family are important, your life is worth living” morals, but is it a bad thing to be so commonly communicated? I would assume that Maeda and the many other writers at Key are trying to convey this, and even if they were or not, intention does not always align with found purpose. Tomoya Okazaki, our protagonist, is a great stand in for players like me to some degree. He's still his own character, but I think him being a loner to align with the usual “wish fulfillment” protagonist role really works to its benefit. No matter your background or role, there is worth in finding friends and family, whether it be genetic or found. It finally gives us purpose to those who feel so aimless in life. Clannad is not simply “wish fulfillment” at play. It's inspiring us to fulfill those wishes ourselves, and fulfill the wishes of others.
I’ve seen complaints about Clannad’s core structure before, as for some people the routes are “not interconnected enough”. But is that a problem? In my opinion, anyway, Clannad is an anthology of the multiple “what if” scenarios surrounding Okazaki’s journey in life. While Nagisa’s route is what leads to the true ending of the story, it doesn’t make the other routes pointless. Regardless of what is the “true” outcome of the story, your experiences and how you see these characters develop will always live on with the player. You get to see Okazaki give these people true happiness in life, and by the true ending, he is repaid for everything he’s done. While in gameplay the route system is a little rough around the edges with much needed polish, I think playing with a guide allows for a very smooth experience.
Playing this after my most prior Key visual novel experience, that being AIR, really opened my eyes to how well thought out and executed much of Clannad is. While AIR suffers from an overly ambitious but ultimately meaningless structure, Clannad takes a safer approach and cuts out any filler. Jun Maeda and his team really wanted to make up for the mistakes of AIR, and you can really tell from how much more polish is applied to this game. Despite this being one of the longest games I’ve ever played, Clannad rarely falls victim to artificial padding. The game gives you and makes proper use of the “skip already read text” feature, which makes hopping into your next route a very quick and easy experience. It helps that the game is split into 10+ routes that all vary in length, meaning I don’t think the game can ever burn you out from a scenario. Each route (with two exceptions, one being entirely optional) is very different overall so nothing is samey either. I’d also like to make note of the amount of content on offer, Clannad is not only long from the main game but has TONS of little secrets and extra blurbs of dialogue to discover, it really feels like the team wanted to put as much as they could onto the disc.
And that’s the overall thing I love about Clannad: it’s very polished. Not perfect, but very damn close. Clannad may seem safe or tropey, but it uses those aspects and pushes them to a wonderful and engaging extent. The current top review tries to make fun of fans of this game and I’d have to say that this person probably has never experienced joy in their life. None of the huge visual novels I’ve played so far have been flops, and Clannad is no exception either. In fact, out of the three (Higurashi, Tsukihime, Clannad) I would say this is my new favorite, and knowing that Key still has some fantastic games in their catalog for me to still try out (Kanon, Little Busters!, and Rewrite) has me so immensely excited. But none of those games, or any visual novels in the future will take away what a special experience Clannad was for me. I had taken a long break from reviews and I needed to get out of that slump, and this game was what inspired me to write a little something again, especially seeing how none of the longer reviews about this game on this site are in good faith. I wanted to fix that. Thank you for reading, and if this review manages to get even one person to fully play through this game, I’ll be happy.

Unicorn Overlord

STORY
I feel the story for Unicorn Overlord overall us good. I wouldn't call it experimental or ground breaking in anyway. Liberate the world from the evil people. It's lore and world building is pretty interesting. I liked the things you learn late game.

The story is separated kind of into sections for each country, with Cornia housing the finale inside. But clearing each other country is its own act of the story sort of.

Drakenhold was pretty great. I enjoyed following Gilbert, Berengaria, Virginia etc. And the villains were good.

Elfheim I didn't think was as strong but I still enjoyed. Rosalinde, Eltolinde were fun to follow and the villains were good.

Bestorias I felt was the weakest section easily. Yunifi and Morard are good but following them wasn't particularly interesting. The magic blue plot device I had little interest in. The Tellius style beast people racism felt very unexplored and uninspired. The final villain and last moment were good though.

Albion was pretty great. Waiting this long to follow Scarlett, a character from your starting party was great. Her interactions with the angels and religion of Albion were good. Nigel was great as well.

The finale was good. Nothing too special there but satisfying enough. There's a bad ending apparently I want to check out.

Overall it's a fine story. I'd tier it in good among other SRPGs I've played.




GAMEPLAY
Man, I know this is similar to some SRPGs, tactics ogre I think? But I haven't played aby like it. Interesting playstyle with a real time unir management system instead of a turn based or priority based grid system. Definitely took an adjustment from my Fire Emblem brain. But when it did it really took off.

Managing groups of up to 5 units who all have skills and items and weapons that great different effects in battle, man it's really satisfying. Forming perfect groups of units, changing them up for certain battles, changing their tactics and gear ooh. Tickled my brain all the time. The maps all play well and are good. None I'd say were bad or gimmicky.

Levels were manageable. I never felt there was a sudden level jump. You always had battles to do at your level. And if you didn't the grinding maps and exp item rewards are super easy to do to catch up your units.

Overworld management was a great way to have something to do after battle. Restoring the cities helped gain money, renown and honors. All important resources. There's tons of different shops and quests and systems to obtain different items and unlock new things to do. One issue I'd say is you get like 3 sets of I'll call them "legendary" weapons. But their base damage is kinda all in the same ball park. And while they have different effects they're not big enough to warrant using one or the other. I guess it's fine cause you have so many units but idk. None felt particularly special since they all functioned mostly the same.

I didn't use every unit and every class. But all I used were all fun and had a role. I never thought one was too weak or too strong. I think Berengaria's and Hilda's were my favorites.

I love the mercenary system. Being able to hire generic units to fill roles and gaps in your army is amazing. I love you can customize their growths, color palette, pick a name and voice. It makes them really personal. I had a cav mercenary named Bruce who I kept till the end cause his voice was Kaiji Tang.

Overall amazing gameplay with TONS of stuff to do and explore. Super impressive stuff.



CHARACTERS
While the story may be only good. I enjoyed a lot of the characters a ton. Characters you follow in the story like I mentioned in that section are great. As well as others you get on the side. My stand out favorites would be Josef, Tatiana, Eltolinde, Hodrick, Renault, Gilbert, Scarlett, Primm, Melisandre and Berengaria, who I married. I'll check out everyone's rapports and Romance scenes eventually. But everything I saw of most of the cast was good.


MISCELLANEOUS
The music is great. The visuals are really good. From the colors and lighting of each scene to the character designs. I loved them a lot. A great English voice cast with new voices to me and iconic actors.

Unicorn Overlord was great. A 58 hour journey that really captured me with its gameplay and provided a good enough story and great cast to keep me engaged. I hear the studio is thinking about making a sequel. If that's true I'll happily take more. What a good time.

Just so disappointing, my respect for this game decreases more and more as time goes on. Bogged down by the weight of its own ideas, lacking in integrity and a travesty of pacing that felt like it didn't remotely respect my time. These issues were present in Remake but they feel worse here, at least that game didn't have a dogshit open world to worry about. Ty Ubisoft towers. God I hated the ending, way to ruin one of the most impactful moments in the history of the medium. I don't need things to be the same but I would prefer they be good

I get why people are so ride or die about Persona 3 now.

it's been weeks since i finished persona 3 fes, and yet i still find myself searching for the words to summarize how i feel about it.

this game is truly stunning in every way. the combat is layered, expertly weaving main plot theme and narrative with it's use of tactics and tartarus. the characters are independent of the mc, with the game being entirely unafraid to explore them in both flaw and strength, writing them in the most natural and real of any persona game. the protagonist is one of the strongest silent protagonists i've ever experienced, ending up as my favourite character for so many reasons, and the skill in which the writers round him out and make him a fully living being in this dark, scary world is unbelievable.

every single shred of persona 3 fes is dripping with its themes, every ending and variable in the game gives you such immense emotion and outlook, with the tone and the atmosphere never shying away.

p3's themes are treasured in my heart, and yet plays with ideas that keep me up at night with worry. it delivers on both with exceptional skill. my all time favourite persona, and a new favourite game of all time.

I never expected any gacha to actually get me, but it appears even I can be fallible. Has an incredibly charming fantasy world that has something for basically everybody to enjoy. Starts off as a very early One Piece-y fantasy RPG adventure and allows itself to branch off into so many other directions at a scale that fills me with absolute wonder and amazement. Gameplay was kinda mind-numbing early on but the later parts really gripped me with how much variety you get in builds and team composition, though I still have a lot to learn about what the hell a grid is. Also been having a very smooth F2P experience personally, though I probably should owe a lot of that to good timing with fully diving in during the 10th Anni celebration. Cagliostro is literally me.