id rather get an actual skin condition than play this d-tier rick and morty episode again

its not completely devoid of fun but its close

more like gains of olympus, holy cow that guy’s strong

super mario galaxy 2 stars

undeniably soulless and if you think this is better than galaxy 1 you probably hold no love in your heart for the medium of video games

really doesnt do anything to improve the original's gameplay (i.e. the combat still feels muddy, especially compared to Sekiro) and also really fails under scrutiny when later sections resort to hardcore aggressive enemy spam that tests the player on how efficiently they can use their force currency to insta-kill enemies rather than actually engage with combat. it adds stuff, but its more facetious fluff than meaningful evolutions of the gameplay.

the metroidvania structure of the original is mostly thrown aside in favor of a more generic open world with side quests and fewer key abilities. it still maintains the facade, but the focus is definitely on being "big," the opposite of where the genre thrives.

story-wise its about as schlocky as the original, although somehow feels more self-serious. the drama still falls completely flat and includes more of it thanks to the naughty-dog-esque "slowly follow behind somebody while they mumble at you" sections during the massive walks between objectives. however, to a lesser extent than the original granted, it still is very much capable of that star wars shlock with insane plot twists and cool displays of force abilities. watching cal use sith abilities on someone because hes pissed about a recent plot twist is awesome, listening to him mumble to his girlfriend about nothing is not. one of those is much more prevalent than the other.

the reason im being so harsh, even though i do ultimately like the game, is because its a sequel to a star wars game. i dont feel like any leeway is granted in something so safe as that, and for it to take so few risks or even improve in any meaningful way makes me inclined to treat it a little more harshly. honestly, as an aside, so much about this game reminds of God of War Ragnarok which i had damn near the exact same feelings about.

heres the review: if you liked fallen order, youll like this. just dont expect to be excited by it.

that extends to the fact there are still ZERO circle wipes in a DAMN STAR WARS GAME

mindless gaming, nintendo fans are eating good

David Cage might be a genius.

That's not to say he's a good writer, God forbid, but rather that he is an incredible entertainer. The sheer clownery that is this game's core premise is almost too much to bear at times, and yet it manages to completely grab my attention. I started this game on a whim hoping to laugh at it, and ended up playing from start to finish.

This is because this game is broken up into three segments, each with VASTLY different quality, keeping the pace up quite nicely. Connor's story, as I'm absolutely positive you know, is far and away the best. It's the only story in this game that I would actually go as far as to say is extremely well written. The relationship between Connor and Hank is extremely compelling and - for me - nervewracking. The dichotomy between them is so perfect that every second spent on these portions is bliss, and every decision not only made me think about what to do for the sake of what happened around me, but dread how it would affect my relationship with Hank. Every choice being a new challenge to face and every interaction with Hank being insightful to his character, simply entertaining to watch thanks to Clancy Brown and Bryan Dechart's performances and the truly, truly quality writing on display for the both of them. The whole game could have been this, and it would be David Cage's masterpiece. Unfortunately, it wasn't. He put Markus in the game.

Markus's portions are bad. They're awful. Every character met has little to no character in their body (almost as if they were robots,) and Markus himself can change personalities on a whim since his "backstory" is flimsy at best. Naturally, this segment has the most impact on the story at large. All is well, though, because it is hilarious. This is the David Cage I was looking for. Markus felt like such a non-entity that being given the freedom to do anything I want with the world and just about 0 consequences was truly liberating and lead to some of my hardest guffaws in the entire playthrough. Seeing such a melodramatic and stupid story that shouldn't even exist unfold into chaos when my benevolent and godlike hands get to hold the reigns of it is truly a wonderful time, and it, too, I wholly recommend to behold.

Kara could not be in this game and nothing would change.

Overall, this game continues to cement David Cage as a staple of the shitty interactive game industry, and I truly don't know where we'd be without him. I sincerely hope he does not make movies because while he is sometimes capable of really reaching the stars, even his blunders are extremely worthwhile entertainment. God speed you clown prince of crap

Also David, did you see what I did there? I spent more time on characters the more interesting they were, and less time when they sucked and nobody cares. Just a little tip from one novice to another

biosucks. this game is real lucky that the big daddies are one of the best enemy designs ever. i shouldve said biocock that wouldve been funnier

please dont fuck up the third one

edit: just play this one again

i remember why we were so harsh on the xbox one launch now

a monotonous, boring, piss-easy game with absolutely nothing going for it. every level plays identical to the last, every enemy can be beaten with the same combo string, every interesting boss fight is undercut by the awful story surrounding it.

Ryse: Son of Rome is an empty, artless, soulless piece of dumbo dookey and deserves every bit of criticism it got upon release.

Easily one of the most ambitious video games ever made, and possibly Nintendo's shining moment as a developer.

That's not because I think it's a perfect game, far from it. I have tons of problems with this game that I share with Ocarina of Time, namely the occasionally esoteric directions the games like giving you. Rather, this game stands as a shining example of perseverance through impossible odds both through its themes and its own troubled development.

Link has been through some shit. While with one hand Nintendo gives Super Mario a beach resort to jump around in, they give Link the experience of seeing his home destroyed time and time again by seemingly insurmountable odds. Link has faced several troubles throughout his lives but its only in Majora's Mask that he faces the most unforgiving opponent he ever will: his own failure. Majora's Mask is the only Zelda game to my knowledge where Link is actively a failure at all turns, coming face-to-face with the only opponent that can't be defeated through bravery alone. Majora's Mask itself is a symbol of failure; it’s a lifeless and unblinking force of nature that serves to introduce nothing but chaos to the world. Destroying the world isn’t even its ultimate goal, it’s just another trick for it to play on the same level as stealing Link’s ocarina or giving him a wedgie. It has no ultimate goal, and the only thing that can be assumed of it is that it is inevitable. Even Link, the hero of time, was unable to stop it. From the opening minutes of the game to minutes from its end, Link and the world he lives in is destroyed by Majora. Without Link’s ability to control time, this would be the end of his story. Even the Song of Time, what was once a symbol of Link’s strength and solace, now serves as a cruel reminder time and time and time again of Link – and the player’s – failure.

This game is really sad. Not quite boo hoo baby sad but more of a solemn sadness. All throughout Termina you see townsfolk surrender to their fate in one way or another. Some continue their lives as it is the only thing they know to do, some try to run from it, and many have no idea what to do. It’s an impossible thing to know how you’ll respond to such a drastic change to your state of living – especially the end of it. A dire situation as this proves the true nature of one’s character, forcing them to respond of their own natural instinct. It may seem pointless to do anything but cry in some instances – this one especially, due to its absolutely helpless nature. But though Link is forced time and time again to resign the world to its fate, he is incapable of resigning himself to it. Though he can’t succeed the first or second or umpteenth time, he is always ready to sack up and try again. It’s not easy (in fact, this game can be a real bitch sometimes) but its often the only thing to do. It may feel like it takes an eternity to accomplish anything whatsoever, and it can be a slog at times, but in the end it’s that bravery to try again and that breadth of experience and knowledge gained through the journey that turns the once helpless odds around. It’s cheesy to get so sappy about a Nintendo 64 game about a wooden mask that smashes the moon into the earth, but the wisdom integral to its design rings true throughout life. The developers of this Nintendo 64 game knew that better than anybody.

I’m not sure how well you know, but this game did not have an easy time during its development. In fact, it was never supposed to exist. It was originally built as a sort of extra bonus journey to be paired with Ocarina of Time, but Aonuma was not willing to spend a second longer developing for an already finished game. He decided it was already time to start working on a new experience. He brought the idea to Miyamoto of making a new game in Ocarina’s engine, and Miyamoto agreed on the terms that it be made in one year. That’s an insanely fucking short timespan of development and it is ridiculous to expect anybody to make anything in that time frame. Aonuma agreed instantly, not being one to back down from new ideas. What followed was one single year of extremely strict development, the team being forced to practically break up into six different mini-teams focused on getting different aspects developed simultaneously. Again, this is insane. You wouldn’t think anybody could expect something like this from their development studio, but Miyamoto did, and the team wasn’t ready to back down from his challenge. In the end, it was through this strict time limit and the tenacity of the developers that the game turned out the way it did, focusing on depth rather than breadth to make the most of what little they could possibly make in their time limit. Through their intensely hard work in that limited timespan of one year they created Majora’s Mask, one of the most beloved and well received video games of all time.

Everything surrounding this game speaks to the value of never giving up. Link couldn’t give up lest his world end just as the developers couldn’t give up lest their hard work and creative vision be thrown out. I don’t think Majora’s Mask is a perfect game, but it is a damn good one that I admire the hell out of. Its design is remarkable, with and without context of its development, and brings forth innovation in game design that seems unheard of today. Designing a world to be alive and dense with content as opposed to making a broad and lifeless yet large world is brilliant, and makes exploration that much more engaging to indulge time and time again as well as making NPC encounters that much more special as they all change over time, never being static for the player’s convenience. Majora’s Mask feels alive, and there haven’t been many games quite like it. Especially since Aonuma went on to be all like “duhhh im retarded im gonna go make breath of the wild which is like the antithesis for everything this game stands for” and then now he just makes shitty games now i guess

dunno if i believe someone designed this game. part of me thinks that it appeared from the heavens one day like the inverted castle and we all collectively agreed it was good shit

if you like this game youre a fucking loser

RGG have done the impossible and made a game with not only good combat, but a story that remains compelling to the end credits. after years of being the only man on earth that wasnt that big into the yakuza games, i gambled on Lost Judgment hoping it would have what i felt those games lacked and was flabbergasted to find out that it did in spades. the combat finally has sauce to go with numerous options in how to handle one enemy or dozens, and the story is not only the best that this studio has likely written but also one of the best currently offered in the medium. rarely ever does a game grab my attention and hold it so vigorously but Lost Judgment, against all odds, did for its entire duration. the soundtrack is also one of RGG's best and thats saying something. kitakata-sensei did nothing wrong

you either beat this with save states or youre a liar