The Magnum Dong Licensed Game List
Licensed games are like assholes; everyone's got them, but what matters is what asshole is better than the other asshole. Did that analogy make any sense, No? Too bad that's the best I can come up with.
(This list will never truly be finished since I can't play every licensed game ever made so I'm gonna be updating this game periodically as I play more or log more that I forgot to log in.)
(This list will never truly be finished since I can't play every licensed game ever made so I'm gonna be updating this game periodically as I play more or log more that I forgot to log in.)
246 Games
It takes the best parts of what Resistance did and adds a lot more fast-paced action scenes, along with much better voiced characters. it's somewhat short; only lasting around 4 to 5 hours, but it's the best 4 to 5 hours this game has to offer.
There's a sense of duty towards playing every game ever made, then there's pure masochism..
The funniest of the original 2 seasons, but feels held back from the true Insanity of the series by it's cheap recycling of contact and its repetition.
actually broken to the point where I couldn't finish the game.
A pretty basic text-based adventure game with little bits of Doctor Who charm sprinkled in.
Honestly the game is so basic I can't even come up with a witty joke for it.
Honestly the game is so basic I can't even come up with a witty joke for it.
A super empty open-world game that is somehow more empty than a Ubisoft game.
I acually honest to god finished this game in less than 30 minutes and I wasn't even trying that much.
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I mean I got the game for free so I can't complain too much but it's still pretty eh.
An actual literal asset flip of a video game, like for real go fuck yourself Activision.
It has a bit of the feel the comics had, but literally everything else is pure bottom of the barrel tier smegma.
I've played better shitty minigame collections.
It's a pretty decent 2d beat-em-up, I'd mainly recommend this If you're a really huge Kevin Smith fan since you're gonna get more out of this than anyone else.
Slow and boring, just the way I hate em.
The epitome of souless, greedy, thoughtless art.
For an Atari version of an arcade game; it's honestly not that bad, given all of the other horrible ports made around that time.
It's not Ice Age 2: The Meltdown................................... yeah nope that's it.
So now you've taken this 2D fighter/platformer and you've turned it into a top-down military strategy RPG with a slot machine instead of normal attacks, and it's really confusing and convoluted. Like I tracked the manual for this game down, and I still didn't understand how to play this game.
I remember playing this on my old iPod Touch when I was in middle during my huge Gorillaz phase. The copium I was taking just justified me even playing it was so strong; in retrospect I feel really sorry for 14 year old STRM.
I feel betrayed, I'm Breaking Bad so hard right now, I Better Call Saul soon, otherwise I might end up like Slippin' Jimmy. :)
I swear if I hear the word Smurf one more god damn time I'm gonna lose my fucking mind.
Pretty fun lightsaber simulator with a story I really couldn't give a shit about. At least Dark Vader was cool.
Cooking Mama if you have a degradation fetish.
Took all the charm away for the original and now we're left with a really mediocre beat him up.
UP yours John Lasseter.
As a Muppets super fan I wished this could have been better, but it still has that Muppet charm I crave.
This felt like one of those old PS2 games you'd play on an old dusty fat PS2 at a rundown daycare behind a supermarket. Yes that did sound super specific and no I didn't play this game growing up.
My disappointment is immeasurable, and my day is ruined.
Quite possibly the most boring game I've ever played in my entire life.
I got the Grimace's Birthday meal, My mcnuggets were hard; as if they were left out for 30 minutes before I got them, my fries were shockley soggy, and the purple shake did something to my stomach that only 20+ dollars of Taco Bell could possibly achieve.
So all and all...........a surprisingly good trip to McDonald's.
So all and all...........a surprisingly good trip to McDonald's.
Somehow the ET mini-game in this is worse than the actual ET game.
An experience I would never put my worst enemy through.
It's pretty much just Ratchet and Clank but lacking everything that makes video games fun.
I find it funny that the only unreleased Atari Star wars game is somehow the best one.
I donβt know why I even bothered playing this but I saw a screenshot with fat fuck gomez platforming and I just had to play it for shits and giggles; I ended up getting so bored with thet I nearly fell asleep playing it, which is kinda strange because unlike movies Iβm constantly using a controller so idk how the hell that happened.
I mean it was free so it's not like complaining about how bare bones it is but it was still super bare bones.
It's not as good as the first GB TMNT game but idk what I expected from GB.
A literal con job.
Great first season to TellTales great run with the characters.
I admire the attempt to make a smash bros but for CN, but it just feels way too floaty for a platformer fighter like this to work.
Festerβs Quest is considered to be up there as one of the worse games the NES has to offer, with itβs god awful controls to itβs amazing βWhere the fuck do I goβ level design, and itβs ever ending amount of enemies that will drain your heath in less then 2 hits. Now donβt get me wrong this is 100% a BAD GAME, but compared to other NES games Iβve played in the past this is far from the worst thing ever; and this game doesn't even come close to the likes of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde or TMNT.
I still kinda wish this made it into a movie instead of a boring PS1 kids game.
Pretty much worse in every way compared to the American NES version, but it does have some weird Japanese jank that can make it funny at times.
It's a fighting game on NES I wouldn't be surprised if it wasn't shit.
This game ironically reflects modern-day Tim Burton very well, it's got style with some really nice visuals for GBA, and nothing else.
This game is generally terrible but you can play as Fred Durst soooooo it's get's an extra star just for that addition.
I feel personally insulted, I feel like someone told me I was getting a gift but instead I got kicked in the balls. The World of The Dark Crystal is so massive and interesting you could make a Skyrim-level game, but instead you gave me a shitty tactic game that's not even that good.
I despise you with every fiber of my being.
I despise you with every fiber of my being.
It's not as bad as people have said but it's still pretty bad.
A genuinely god awful experience. filled with some of the most assholish level design I've ever seen.
the scream sound effect is honest to god one of the worst things I've ever had the displeasure to hear through my ear holes.
It's about on par with episode 4 on NES, IE not great but has some really nice looking visuals for NES and especially for an NES licensed games.
Out of all the Ghostbusters games on NES the bests one was the one not released in the US, yeah that seems to track in most circumstances.
Ghostbusters?
How about you go bust some bitches.
How about you go bust some bitches.
I don't think I've ever understood the point of hooters so I was kinda hoping this game would enlighten me on only men in their late 30s and early 40s seem to flock there in droves while objectifying the waitresses in the process.
I learned nothing and I'm still perplexed.
I learned nothing and I'm still perplexed.
I'll say this much it perfectly encapsulates my feelings on the current run of the show. It's boring, forgettable, and it looks like ass.
idk about you but I think license games on NES just suck.
An actual stain on the show's legacy.
It's an excellent replacement for Friday the 13th the game if that game ever just disappears the way the Scott Pilgrim game did.
One of my favorite and most influential to me as a wannabe filmmaker....................THANKS I HATE IT.
I was really desperate to find games to play around October.
It's literally the same game as the Austin Power one but instead of it being Austin Power themed it's Dr. Evil themed, which makes it 10 times better by default.
About as stander as licensed games come.
All it really does is ape on the "God of War-like" gameplay that was popular at the time and slaps the Green Lantern name on it. I guess it was playable but other than that it was just really unmemorable and dull.
All it really does is ape on the "God of War-like" gameplay that was popular at the time and slaps the Green Lantern name on it. I guess it was playable but other than that it was just really unmemorable and dull.
It's the puzzle game that I've always wanted, building pathways and solving puzzles with actual lego bricks, how come no one thought of this idea before.
It's just Pinball.........................................................................................................................................................
I haven't played a DnD session that didn't end in pure chaos, but at least I had fun in those game. There is very little fun here outside of the basic ass AAA live services crap.
Something about the music and the way everything looks makes this feel more like a Silent Hill game.
It's pretty fun at times but it's a bit slow hack and slash game.
Kinda wish I could like this as much as everyone else but I just don't like the Sega Genesis that much.
As a piece of Doctor Who media and the first ever Doctor Who video game, it has literally nothing to do with the show outside of the show's theme at the beginning and the Tardis showing up in 2 levels. It really does feel like the BBC just threw money at a slapped-together mess just to get people interested in the show again; so I guess it's a great meta-commentary on the state of the show in the early to mid-80s.
Mario Party but boring and unfun.
It's a super cheap feeling racing game, if I were a kid I'd probably liked it but still I feel like kids nowadays deserve better.
It's just like any other Atari game released near the crash, forgettable.
I still to this day don't know how this game even works, and after 6 years I'm gonna blame the game on this one rather than my own incompetence.
When I was still in school I spent a lot of money on this game. One day my grandmother asked me what I was spending all of my money and not saving it, I then thought about it and I had to ask myself "is this really worth it", I then spent around 10 more dollars on this game and it continued like this for another 5 months until I got bored with the game and moved on to something else.
I deeply hate past STRM so much.
I deeply hate past STRM so much.
I don't give a shit about Fast and The Furious so this didn't really do a lot for me.
It's fun for the first 2 or 3 hours but it slowly stopped being funny and the puzzles start becoming really annoying.
They took the literal concept of the game and slapped it onto a SNES cartridge.
All you do is fight Scratchy with really bad hit detection while dealing with bad platforming until you hit him enough to where you fight him in a boss fight.
Honestly I would've liked it if they had gotten more creative with the concept but this was a cash-in so it's not like it mattered all that much to the devs.
All you do is fight Scratchy with really bad hit detection while dealing with bad platforming until you hit him enough to where you fight him in a boss fight.
Honestly I would've liked it if they had gotten more creative with the concept but this was a cash-in so it's not like it mattered all that much to the devs.
I've always preferred this game over the original arcade game mostly for nostalgic reasons. Pretty much everything from the sprites to movement is better along with the music just HHHEEEMMMMMM it slaps. I still prefer the SNES version more since I feel the pacing in that game is much better and higher boss count makes the fanservies part of my brain happy; but realistically you canβt go wrong with either version of the game.
I mean it's still not the worst bastardization I've seen for this series, Doomsday Clock still exist.
A pretty nice return to form for Spongebob 3D platformers, but there's this weird feeling of aimlessness emitting from it.
GB games come in 3 categories, ok, shit, god awful. This one just falls under ok which is amazing for most GB games.
I wanna find the weirdo at Rockstar who thought it would be a good idea to make a whole GBC game that's just a simulated Austin Powers desktop. Mostly so I can give them like a billion dollars and let their imagination run wild.
All of my friends hate this game but idk I had fun with it.
It took everything from the last Horse Adventures game and just made it worse. Who in their right minds thought it'd be a good idea to have the game be an open world with a camera this horrible.
No wonder the Barbie Horse Adventures series is dead.
No wonder the Barbie Horse Adventures series is dead.
This is what VR was made for, this is the shit that I crave.
Less of a game and more of a tech demo.
Where's my money Dominos?
It's Saw in it's purest form, too bad I don't like Saw.
You're basic Wii shovelware slock, I'm still baffled at the mere existence of this as a game.
Dear Mom and Dad. I no longer fear hell, because I've finished Bart Simpson's Escape from Camp Deadly
I don't give a shit about this show so I don't even know why I played it, but needles to say it was still really bad.
This is a declaration of war to all Pepsi drinkers, the Coke Army thinks weβre weak but we will not take this atrocity lying down. I will take it upon myself to do the most righteous and forthcoming plan Iβve ever conceived. Breaking into people's houses at night and replacing all of their Coke with Pepsi by opening each individual can and bottle; dump it all out and replace it with Pepsi and then factory reseal them with Pepsi; that way they can finally realize the taste of pepsi and coke are so different that the label doesn't matter and theyβll go right into out pepsi loving arms. This normally will take a night (or two) but with the help of volunteers we can push back the influence of the Red Menace and make the world a peace loving Pepsi Utopia.
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People who've said this is "the worst game of 2023" really need to play more games, or at least play more licensed video games, because while this is a fucking awful game; I've seen far worse come out of the AAA seen and they have even less of a reason to end up the way they do.
The Chicken fight was pretty good but everything else was just kinda bland.
If I had a nickle for every bad handheld that was a tie in for a former SNL star's mediocre comedy I'd have 2 nickles, which isn't a lot but it's weird it happened twice.
It's a pretty mediocre GB platformer. Barbies hitbox is way too big and the game is too floaty.
Yes it's as bad as everyone said it is.
While it's held down by a few too many visual bugs and the game visually looks very cheap, I can't deny the devs have a pure passion and love for this comic and the outstanding story it tells. It's not gonna win any awards but it's a game that stays true to the comics nature which is all you can really ask for with a license games.
3 Comments
sam and max this high is mega based
Seeing I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream one space before The Simpson's game lmao
NOWITSREYNTIME17
2 years ago