The Magnum Dong Licensed Game List
Licensed games are like assholes; everyone's got them, but what matters is what asshole is better than the other asshole. Did that analogy make any sense, No? Too bad that's the best I can come up with.
(This list will never truly be finished since I can't play every licensed game ever made so I'm gonna be updating this game periodically as I play more or log more that I forgot to log in.)
(This list will never truly be finished since I can't play every licensed game ever made so I'm gonna be updating this game periodically as I play more or log more that I forgot to log in.)
246 Games
I remember playing this on my old iPod Touch when I was in middle during my huge Gorillaz phase. The copium I was taking just justified me even playing it was so strong; in retrospect I feel really sorry for 14 year old STRM.
I find it funny that the only unreleased Atari Star wars game is somehow the best one.
As a huge Robocop fan this game was high on my list of things I really wanted to get excited for but just didn't because I've been burned before in the past and hype always leads to disappointment. So it's very fulfilling to finally get to play a Robocop game that's not only really good but also has that classic charm that I always loved from the movies.
It alright, it not subtle or nuanced, it tasteless and lukewarm.........naa that's being a bit too mean.
The truth is I did enjoy this game quite a bit, the combat is still pretty solid, the side missions feel less like filler and more like proper missions, everything with Kraven is fantastic, and side stuff with Peter's former villains are all really great and do a better job delivering the game's overall narrative themes better than the main story to an extent. I feel like the further we get into the story the worse it gets and the more rushed it feels. I genuinely believe if you gave the symbiote arc more time to breath, made Venom less of a one note villain, and actually found something for Miles to do in the main story besides getting over his anger towards Mr. Negative you could've had something really special on your hands, and I know that for a fact since Kraven is by far the best part of the game hands down, Insomniac did their homework and then some like holy shit.
All and all a perfectly serviceable sequel that I wished tried a little bit harder
(Wake me up when Arkane's Blade comes out in 4 years)
The truth is I did enjoy this game quite a bit, the combat is still pretty solid, the side missions feel less like filler and more like proper missions, everything with Kraven is fantastic, and side stuff with Peter's former villains are all really great and do a better job delivering the game's overall narrative themes better than the main story to an extent. I feel like the further we get into the story the worse it gets and the more rushed it feels. I genuinely believe if you gave the symbiote arc more time to breath, made Venom less of a one note villain, and actually found something for Miles to do in the main story besides getting over his anger towards Mr. Negative you could've had something really special on your hands, and I know that for a fact since Kraven is by far the best part of the game hands down, Insomniac did their homework and then some like holy shit.
All and all a perfectly serviceable sequel that I wished tried a little bit harder
(Wake me up when Arkane's Blade comes out in 4 years)
As someone who is a huge Hellboy fan (Mike Mignola being a horrible person aside) you couldn’t find someone more excited for this game than me. From the amazing looking shaders Upstream were using to replicate Mignola’s heavy shadows art style to the combat looking fun from the small bits I saw from gameplay videos it look to be the first Hellboy video game that was not only a faithful adaptation from the comics; but also a good game on top of that. Unfortunately that’s not what we got, what we got is a super mediocre roguelike that is so piss easy and repetitive it fails at the most basic approach of being a roguelike.
People who've said this is "the worst game of 2023" really need to play more games, or at least play more licensed video games, because while this is a fucking awful game; I've seen far worse come out of the AAA seen and they have even less of a reason to end up the way they do.
I got the Grimace's Birthday meal, My mcnuggets were hard; as if they were left out for 30 minutes before I got them, my fries were shockley soggy, and the purple shake did something to my stomach that only 20+ dollars of Taco Bell could possibly achieve.
So all and all...........a surprisingly good trip to McDonald's.
So all and all...........a surprisingly good trip to McDonald's.
It’s literally every single AAA open world “RPG” but this time it has an expensive license video games sheen.
𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐑𝐞𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐝 𝐁𝐨𝐲?
I got banned from thus game by using cosmetic mods lol.
Take every single element of the older TMNT beat-em-up games and turns everything up to 11.
The visuals and sprite work is outstanding, it does such a good job replicating the look of the 80's show right down to the background looking like they were done with watercolor.
The OST is also amazing, knowing that Tee Lopes did the work on this makes a lot of sense since he's really good when it comes to capturing the tone and sound on specific projects he works on. (side note: never before did I think I'd hear Wu-Tang Clan in a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles video game but here we are).
This is the perfect TMNT game through and through.
The visuals and sprite work is outstanding, it does such a good job replicating the look of the 80's show right down to the background looking like they were done with watercolor.
The OST is also amazing, knowing that Tee Lopes did the work on this makes a lot of sense since he's really good when it comes to capturing the tone and sound on specific projects he works on. (side note: never before did I think I'd hear Wu-Tang Clan in a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles video game but here we are).
This is the perfect TMNT game through and through.
It's an excellent replacement for Friday the 13th the game if that game ever just disappears the way the Scott Pilgrim game did.
By no means is this game bad, hell even with all its faults I still think this is probably the best Lego game we've had in a long time; but with that being said I feel like it might be a little too ambitious for its own good.
It takes the best parts of what Resistance did and adds a lot more fast-paced action scenes, along with much better voiced characters. it's somewhat short; only lasting around 4 to 5 hours, but it's the best 4 to 5 hours this game has to offer.
The funniest of the original 2 seasons, but feels held back from the true Insanity of the series by it's cheap recycling of contact and its repetition.
A literal con job.
Went in with zero expectations and came out pleasantly surprised.
I swear if I hear the word Smurf one more god damn time I'm gonna lose my fucking mind.
I'm sure if I was a kid and also liked Peppa Pig I'd be going crazy for this game, but I'm a 21 year old adult and I don't think this game was made for me.
I'll say this much it perfectly encapsulates my feelings on the current run of the show. It's boring, forgettable, and it looks like ass.
Hey you want Smash Bros but without the polish and made from the perspective of melee fans only.
I don’t know why I even bothered playing this but I saw a screenshot with fat fuck gomez platforming and I just had to play it for shits and giggles; I ended up getting so bored with thet I nearly fell asleep playing it, which is kinda strange because unlike movies I’m constantly using a controller so idk how the hell that happened.
I mean I got the game for free so I can't complain too much but it's still pretty eh.
I haven't played a DnD session that didn't end in pure chaos, but at least I had fun in those game. There is very little fun here outside of the basic ass AAA live services crap.
How many of you motherfucker even knew this was a licensed game, maybe if you did you wouldn't have your expectations so unrealistically high.
Great first season to TellTales great run with the characters.
It's the same great game but shorter and with slightly better combat, just wished its story and characters reached the same unbelievable heights as the first game.
I don't give a shit about this show so I don't even know why I played it, but needles to say it was still really bad.
It's a super cheap feeling racing game, if I were a kid I'd probably liked it but still I feel like kids nowadays deserve better.
It's the ship parts of Battlefront 2 but made into a whole game, never been a fan of the ship parts so shockingly not a huge fan of this either.
A super empty open-world game that is somehow more empty than a Ubisoft game.
The antithesis with everything wrong with modern AAA gaming.
It's pretty fun at times but it's a bit slow hack and slash game.
I don't give a shit about Fast and The Furious so this didn't really do a lot for me.
It's a pretty decent 2d beat-em-up, I'd mainly recommend this If you're a really huge Kevin Smith fan since you're gonna get more out of this than anyone else.
All of my friends hate this game but idk I had fun with it.
I feel personally insulted, I feel like someone told me I was getting a gift but instead I got kicked in the balls. The World of The Dark Crystal is so massive and interesting you could make a Skyrim-level game, but instead you gave me a shitty tactic game that's not even that good.
I despise you with every fiber of my being.
I despise you with every fiber of my being.
This is what VR was made for, this is the shit that I crave.
It's the puzzle game that I've always wanted, building pathways and solving puzzles with actual lego bricks, how come no one thought of this idea before.
It's the same stiff Dark Souls combat but with a Star Wars skin on it, and if that's you're cup of tea then have fun. Personally, eeehhh it's pretty ok.
A pretty alright shooter with a super well-realized annotation of the iconography that the Terminator movies have.
While it's held down by a few too many visual bugs and the game visually looks very cheap, I can't deny the devs have a pure passion and love for this comic and the outstanding story it tells. It's not gonna win any awards but it's a game that stays true to the comics nature which is all you can really ask for with a license games.
𝕽𝖞𝖆𝖓 𝖜𝖍𝖞 𝖍𝖆𝖛𝖊 𝖞𝖔𝖚 𝖋𝖔𝖗𝖘𝖆𝖐𝖊𝖓 𝖚𝖘
It's about as middle of the road as modern-day licensed games come.
Get away from me you slave owner, your chicken sucks.
You had so much potential and squandered all of it, I'm so disappointed in you.
I mean it was free so it's not like complaining about how bare bones it is but it was still super bare bones.
I feel betrayed, I'm Breaking Bad so hard right now, I Better Call Saul soon, otherwise I might end up like Slippin' Jimmy. :)
Pretty fun lightsaber simulator with a story I really couldn't give a shit about. At least Dark Vader was cool.
I don't even understand how this could have even turn out so awful. Like this is the Endgame of Anime games this should have been the best of the best how did this be so shitty.
It's only of the very few newer LEGO games that I actually liked a lot, which is telling since most of the newer ones just bore me.
is realll good.
A pretty decent finally to the series and a super depression end to Telltale.
Yeah no thank you this fucking sucks.
I acually honest to god finished this game in less than 30 minutes and I wasn't even trying that much.
Modern-day South Park depresses the shit out of me man.
Took all the interesting bits of the first game and just watered it down and made it boring.
You were doing great after MVC3 what the fuck happend.
Less of a game and more of a tech demo.
It's the most fun I've ever had with friends with a multiplayer game. This will always have a place in my heart.
It's fun for the first 2 or 3 hours but it slowly stopped being funny and the puzzles start becoming really annoying.
Not only did it really derail the story and characters they were working with, but it also shows off the depressing decline of quality Telltale was going through at the time.
One of the most boring VR games I've played. It has a fun novelty but it wears off very quickly.
Quite possibly the most boring game I've ever played in my entire life.
Platinum what the fuck I thought you were better than this.
Don't really care all that much about this one, I was just really bored by it.
When I was still in school I spent a lot of money on this game. One day my grandmother asked me what I was spending all of my money and not saving it, I then thought about it and I had to ask myself "is this really worth it", I then spent around 10 more dollars on this game and it continued like this for another 5 months until I got bored with the game and moved on to something else.
I deeply hate past STRM so much.
I deeply hate past STRM so much.
A third-person/first-person shooter made for people who don't like shooters.
This game quite honestly has no reason to be as good as it is. The chel shading art style is on point, everything about its combat is super solid. Really the only thing I can criticize is mostly just getting a bit to repetitive after awhile since unlike other Platinum Games combat loop, but it’s not like it really matters since the game is like 3 hours long, there's really little reason to replay the game as well other than to get a better score on the levels. I guess if you’re a dieheart Gen 1 Transformers fan you’d get a kick out of it but good luck trying to find it, it’s been delisted for all online storefront and finding a cheap steam key is even harder. Honestly I don’t even know why I own this game since I’m not even that big of a Transformers fan (I’m more of a Ninja Turtles kind of person) I just sorta had this in a PS4 library as if it magically apprised there out of thin air.
Oh well I’m not gonna complain, I may not have PT but at least I have this.
Oh well I’m not gonna complain, I may not have PT but at least I have this.
Look it has Sonic in it so I'm not gonna complain.
My disappointment is immeasurable, and my day is ruined.
It's a generic open-world game that has faithful iconography, and a story that feels like it could've been a real Mad Max movie.
Anime was a mistake.
As the ending to the Arkham series it's kinda shit. As a new game in the Arkham series, it's pretty ok.
No Clayface 7/10
No Clayface 7/10
An actual literal asset flip of a video game, like for real go fuck yourself Activision.
I feel like the best way to look at this is to look at it in two ways. As a game itself, its gameplay loop is really repetitive, there is very little content for the at the time 60 dollar asking price, and the Kaiju's are very sluggish and hard to use.
With all of that being said you can also look at it as a Godzilla fan. The models for the Kaijus look really good, the destruction looks fantastic, and all the sparks coming off the explosions look great; like it was ripped right out of the movies. The sound effects and music are also really good, all of it is ripped right from the movies so everything fits perfectly.
Really if you are a die-hard Godzilla fan you'll be able to look beyond the slow and clunky movement and janky combat to have a fun if a little repetitive Godzilla game.
If you've only seen a handful of Godzilla movie, and most of them being the recent Legendary Pictures movies, then stay the hell away from this because you'll probably hate it. Then again this game is stupidly hard to find so honestly; you'll probably be fine.
With all of that being said you can also look at it as a Godzilla fan. The models for the Kaijus look really good, the destruction looks fantastic, and all the sparks coming off the explosions look great; like it was ripped right out of the movies. The sound effects and music are also really good, all of it is ripped right from the movies so everything fits perfectly.
Really if you are a die-hard Godzilla fan you'll be able to look beyond the slow and clunky movement and janky combat to have a fun if a little repetitive Godzilla game.
If you've only seen a handful of Godzilla movie, and most of them being the recent Legendary Pictures movies, then stay the hell away from this because you'll probably hate it. Then again this game is stupidly hard to find so honestly; you'll probably be fine.
It's a fantastic game from the first 5 hours, after that it stops being scary and just becomes a slog to get through, there is no reason why this game should be 25 hours long.
The Mcdonalds of video games, IE it's bland and boring as fuck but the only reason you eat it is because of the recognizable name.
This game sucks my Spider-Balls.
It's the closest a game has ever been when it came to putting you into the actual show itself while also just being a great game as well.
A confusing mess of 3 different scrips slap dashed togather with almot no effort to make each episode connect togather in some way.
It’s pretty amazing that even after making a game that did a really job adapting the source material along with having most of the voice cast come back to reprise their roles, you somehow made a game that feels like it has nothing to do with Adventure Time outside of having the characters and some references.
How come a game based on one of my favorite TV shows has to be one of the worst games I've ever played. I mean come on man give me a break.
look son I'm not mad at you, I'm just disappointed that's all.
The most tedious and by the numbers Arkham game to date, at least the setting is pretty great.
No Clayface 4/10
No Clayface 4/10
It's pretty much just Ratchet and Clank but lacking everything that makes video games fun.
The Pirates world was pretty cool but other than that this feels pretty bare bones compared to what Skylanders was doing.
Truly this was......... a DuckTale
The game that popularized the character and simultaneously ruined him at the same time. On top of that it's also repetitive as shit and super unfunny. Thanks I hate it.
Pretty whatever short kid game, it looked pretty nice for a cheap digital game but that's about all I can really say about it.
I kinda wonder how much of the fun I had with this game came from actual enjoyment of the game itself and not because of the insane amount of nostalgia I have for this game.
The Chicken fight was pretty good but everything else was just kinda bland.
A downgrade in almost every way. Its world and story feels less ambitious, its gameplay is more simplistic, the writing is dull, the AI for Oswald is awful almost making it mandatory to play with someone, and worst of all; it's just boring.
It took everything I had a problem with with War of Cybertron and just made them better and smoother.
Slightly better than the movie but not by much.
The best game I've seen in a long time that tried doing the Story centered Choice-based game.
I think the idea is super cool, the only downside is that it's on the Xbox Kinect. You know, the thing that barely even worked most of the time.
I hate Mobile games man, I really fucking hate them
The comics are 90's as shit and not in the good way. So this feels like a good mix of The Sopranos and HP Lovecraft and somehow it feels 10 times better
You're basic Wii shovelware slock, I'm still baffled at the mere existence of this as a game.
3 Comments
sam and max this high is mega based
Seeing I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream one space before The Simpson's game lmao
NOWITSREYNTIME17
2 years ago