aughhhh
BACKER
2023
i can tell that the game is great, I really can; I just don't vibe with the core cast. maybe once a couple of seasons are out I'll find a character that hooks me but for now, I'm happy that other people are having fun with it.
battle tracks are legit ass though
battle tracks are legit ass though
2021
I can understand wanting to make an 'experimental' sequel to your game, but I don't think that "what if we make our game as much like Slay the Spire as we possibly can" is a very good experiment
2023
Originally, I wasn't a big fan of the first installment, with its
cloying setting and uneven storytelling. I wasn't expecting
this game to be as good as it is, but I'm happy to eat crow.
on the one hand, the writing is exceptionally good, with a
particularly darker bent than the first game's feel-good tone.
and on the other, the combat is exponentially cleaner and
tighter than any of its modern jrpg contemporaries.
hot take: Temenos and Crick are boyfriends, right?
cloying setting and uneven storytelling. I wasn't expecting
this game to be as good as it is, but I'm happy to eat crow.
on the one hand, the writing is exceptionally good, with a
particularly darker bent than the first game's feel-good tone.
and on the other, the combat is exponentially cleaner and
tighter than any of its modern jrpg contemporaries.
hot take: Temenos and Crick are boyfriends, right?
2017
there is a not-insignificant overlap between the group of people who feel that this game is too hard and the group of people who earnestly believe that sekiro: shadows die twice is a rhythm game.
the game is good (though I am glad I picked it up post-robust DLC catalogue and not during its shaky development) and is directly responsible for the growing severity of my whole ongoing carpal tunnel issue (but it's fine and I wasn't using that hand for anything important anyway)
the game is good (though I am glad I picked it up post-robust DLC catalogue and not during its shaky development) and is directly responsible for the growing severity of my whole ongoing carpal tunnel issue (but it's fine and I wasn't using that hand for anything important anyway)
2016
I am trapped between two worlds
World 1) my partner walked in on me playing this. "it's a puzzle game," I said, remembering how much he enjoyed playing through return of the obra dinn with me. "you like puzzle games. do you want to try this together?" anyway, he sat behind me for a total of five minutes before throwing up his hands in despair and walking out. "I'm not gonna fucking sit here and watch you play snake for hours," he said.
World 2) My friend, who recommended I play this, is very excited to watch my progress as I make the way through; this has been a harrowing experience where he makes soft noises of disapproval as I attempt to lizard brain my way through the puzzles. it is destroying my self esteem and it's not like that was in a good place to begin with
so like, i'm not at a point where i can review this but: please send help
World 1) my partner walked in on me playing this. "it's a puzzle game," I said, remembering how much he enjoyed playing through return of the obra dinn with me. "you like puzzle games. do you want to try this together?" anyway, he sat behind me for a total of five minutes before throwing up his hands in despair and walking out. "I'm not gonna fucking sit here and watch you play snake for hours," he said.
World 2) My friend, who recommended I play this, is very excited to watch my progress as I make the way through; this has been a harrowing experience where he makes soft noises of disapproval as I attempt to lizard brain my way through the puzzles. it is destroying my self esteem and it's not like that was in a good place to begin with
so like, i'm not at a point where i can review this but: please send help
2022
Much has been said about the quality and customizability of the combat (it's fantastic), but one of my favorite things about the Tactics Ogre is how even though the end results of your decisions might be virtually identical, the writing is elegant enough to obfuscate that into really feeling like player choice is important. Make a decision early on, and character X will leave you, disgusted by your actions; choose the opposite choice, and that same character leaves you - this time, revealing that no matter what choice you made, they'd disagree with it, because they hate your fucking guts. It may feel kind of dishonest, but frankly? That's consistent writing, and I respect it.
Anyway Canopus could split me open like a ripe, juicy coconut 🥥🥥
Anyway Canopus could split me open like a ripe, juicy coconut 🥥🥥
2012
the beginning of a decade+ of trust issues
1997
there is no game in the world that I want a modern remaster of more. sure, the samurai/ninja power fantasy is simulated in loving detail, but you haven't known true combat until you and your opponent are crawling toward each other with your one remaining good arm after you've taken out all of eachother's other limbs , flailing your weapons helplessly at each other like you're crabs with knives
2016
i remember this the least of any soulslike game I've played except for the fight at the end of Ashes of Ariendel, which is basically worth all four of the above stars by itself.
2014
can i just make my review "suck it, David Cage" and leave it there? oh, I can? perfect. that's perfect.
2019
in spite of the fact (or perhaps because of it) that this game is ugly as shit and engineered to be deeply unfair, it's still fun. hostile design at its finest
2023
it's smut, but it's charming smut with some pretty funny dialogue. also: the big bara titty fox boy's cock basically has its own zip code. so, there's that.
2009
now that there's a mod to disable groomer mode it's probably the best way to play p3, and the only way to curb mitsuru's disgusting marin karin addiction once and for all
2023
the gameplay is pretty great objectively. but the story/art/music/character design/writing/dialogue is such a downgrade from 3h that it makes me feel deeply aware that i'm rapidly hurtling toward the heat death of the universe every second i spend playing it. like, the rest of it is so unequivocally bad that i feel myself growing exponentially dumber the longer i play it. sure, i may become a tactical genius by the endgame, but what's the use when this is all over and i have the mental capacity of a bowl of soup?
depending on who you are and what your needs are, this not a great game to play if you have unresolved relationship trauma; or, alternately, it's a great game to play if you want to feel very very bad and completely unloveable