MaxyBee
1992
It would be far too easy to focus on everything Mega Man 5 lacks. It still feels a bit like Zombie Simpsons, and I don't think that stink ever truly goes away, but coming off of the massive disappointment of Mega Man 4 I think MM5 deserves appreciation for what it does right, and how it (mostly) course corrects the franchise into something that feels more gameplay-oriented than MM4.
Sometimes it's the little things. Having the weapon get screens show a rotating version of the sprite you control rather than a large cartoon head makes it feel like the plot is shifted ever so slightly back. And it is. Whilst the "is Proto Man evil?" plot does drive things, it feels more like a straight run of fun robot masters followed by a couple of trench runs through two big bases. I'm still largely of the mind that having two bases to conquer is kind of needless padding, but you can forgive it a bit when the rest of the game feels tight enough.
The robot masters are mmmmmmostly good. Star Man is a joke, but at least he's a joke that's fun to take on. Charge Man is... theoretically fine, but using Stone Man's absolutely dogshit weapon against him is... embarrassing? It's embarrassing that any weapon could be as poorly designed as the power stone. Especially as most other weapons are decent! Gravity Hold is a big old nothing, but these two aside I actually really like the implementation of the other weapons, including the new, rideable Super Arrow, which renders the weirdly nerfed Rush Jet pointless while also being a versatile weapon that feels essential to at least one fight.
Actually, poor Rush eats a lot of shit this time out. Rush Coil has changed so that he jumps with you, and it sucks. Just 99% less reliable and prone to all sorts of glitches, a stupid change that gained us nothing. And that's... it. Two forms, both not very good at all. I'm glad that his big expansion is on the horizon, at least.
No, the real useful creature is he mid-game unlockable bird Beat, who allows you to just fire and forget, freeing the player up to focus on precision dodging while Beat chips away at enemy health. An inspired idea that's just a smidge too over-powered to feel fair, especially as the letters you have to collect to unlock the bird are far too sloppily placed.
The final run of levels are pretty fun. The bosses in particular are neat challenges that kept me on my toes (except whenever I had energy for Beat) with memorable enough designs, and the levels leading to them merged repeating challenges from the main stages with new ideas that made it feel like more than a long victory lap before Wily.
I don't know, I'm feeling positive here. It's a good time. Even the charge shot is useful now. But the game still suffers from the negatives MM4 had, just a bit less so, and brings new problems to the table just to make this hard to rate. Still, a solid 3 stars, and evidence that just because you've entered a safe pattern, you don't have to just wallow in mediocrity. Let's hope 6 keeps this energy up.
Sometimes it's the little things. Having the weapon get screens show a rotating version of the sprite you control rather than a large cartoon head makes it feel like the plot is shifted ever so slightly back. And it is. Whilst the "is Proto Man evil?" plot does drive things, it feels more like a straight run of fun robot masters followed by a couple of trench runs through two big bases. I'm still largely of the mind that having two bases to conquer is kind of needless padding, but you can forgive it a bit when the rest of the game feels tight enough.
The robot masters are mmmmmmostly good. Star Man is a joke, but at least he's a joke that's fun to take on. Charge Man is... theoretically fine, but using Stone Man's absolutely dogshit weapon against him is... embarrassing? It's embarrassing that any weapon could be as poorly designed as the power stone. Especially as most other weapons are decent! Gravity Hold is a big old nothing, but these two aside I actually really like the implementation of the other weapons, including the new, rideable Super Arrow, which renders the weirdly nerfed Rush Jet pointless while also being a versatile weapon that feels essential to at least one fight.
Actually, poor Rush eats a lot of shit this time out. Rush Coil has changed so that he jumps with you, and it sucks. Just 99% less reliable and prone to all sorts of glitches, a stupid change that gained us nothing. And that's... it. Two forms, both not very good at all. I'm glad that his big expansion is on the horizon, at least.
No, the real useful creature is he mid-game unlockable bird Beat, who allows you to just fire and forget, freeing the player up to focus on precision dodging while Beat chips away at enemy health. An inspired idea that's just a smidge too over-powered to feel fair, especially as the letters you have to collect to unlock the bird are far too sloppily placed.
The final run of levels are pretty fun. The bosses in particular are neat challenges that kept me on my toes (except whenever I had energy for Beat) with memorable enough designs, and the levels leading to them merged repeating challenges from the main stages with new ideas that made it feel like more than a long victory lap before Wily.
I don't know, I'm feeling positive here. It's a good time. Even the charge shot is useful now. But the game still suffers from the negatives MM4 had, just a bit less so, and brings new problems to the table just to make this hard to rate. Still, a solid 3 stars, and evidence that just because you've entered a safe pattern, you don't have to just wallow in mediocrity. Let's hope 6 keeps this energy up.
2022
Peach is mad, Mario is invincible, and I'm having a great time. Mario 64 hasn't aged super well in many regards, but this shows the sort of QoL changes you could make that'd bring it forward. Or just tech to make awesome fan games. Whichever.
2010
If Mega Man 9 was a stunning return to form, this was demonstrative of the trap of making Mega Man. It’s good, it’s still very good, but when it’s so similar to MM9 it often feels like a needless sequel, more of the same, et cetera. The exact sort of accusations that got thrown at the later games in the original NES six!
I think what it does well it does VERY well. It’s precision-platforming with twitch reactions to myriad threats, capped off with a boss fight at the end of each section. The balance is a little different to MM9, in that the levels feel easier and the robot masters harder, putting them about level, but I much preferred MM9’s method of hard levels and robot masters as a twee little reward at the end. But then I often find what I want and what the developers and more general fanbase want to be at odds.
Which brings me to the story. It’s unobtrusive, which is all I ever want, but also daft as a bag of hammers. The threat of roboenza is the sort of Saturday morning cartoon stuff that the animé-oriented direction of many Mega Man games strives for, but… I dunno, I actually kind of like it. It’s that step beyond serious, into knowingly absurd. A flu for robots. A virus? But literally the sniffles. That’s brilliant, and being kept to the sidelines it was just a goofy little thing to smile about while my poor brain recovered from whatever challenges I’d just faced.
The Wily castle run is possibly an all-timer, held back only by those pods containing abilities from earlier robot masters. I know people hated Doc Robot (more fool them I loved it), but at least that had personality, and moved about and stuff! Watching orange squares slide about summoning tornadoes and doing mysterious slashes is just… nothing. But yes those aside it’s a delight, pushing me just enough to need to get up and walk around, or maybe squeeze my controller until the plastic creaks a little, but never enough to throw a great big wobbly. That’s the difficulty I want in video games.
I don’t know if I’d have been satisfied if this was it. If MM9 was the end it would feel like a triumphant retro celebration. If this was, it’d feel like getting a little more juice out of the lemon (ha), nothing more.
Good thing there’s one more game to go. Review 100 approaches. Mega Man 11 approaches.
I think what it does well it does VERY well. It’s precision-platforming with twitch reactions to myriad threats, capped off with a boss fight at the end of each section. The balance is a little different to MM9, in that the levels feel easier and the robot masters harder, putting them about level, but I much preferred MM9’s method of hard levels and robot masters as a twee little reward at the end. But then I often find what I want and what the developers and more general fanbase want to be at odds.
Which brings me to the story. It’s unobtrusive, which is all I ever want, but also daft as a bag of hammers. The threat of roboenza is the sort of Saturday morning cartoon stuff that the animé-oriented direction of many Mega Man games strives for, but… I dunno, I actually kind of like it. It’s that step beyond serious, into knowingly absurd. A flu for robots. A virus? But literally the sniffles. That’s brilliant, and being kept to the sidelines it was just a goofy little thing to smile about while my poor brain recovered from whatever challenges I’d just faced.
The Wily castle run is possibly an all-timer, held back only by those pods containing abilities from earlier robot masters. I know people hated Doc Robot (more fool them I loved it), but at least that had personality, and moved about and stuff! Watching orange squares slide about summoning tornadoes and doing mysterious slashes is just… nothing. But yes those aside it’s a delight, pushing me just enough to need to get up and walk around, or maybe squeeze my controller until the plastic creaks a little, but never enough to throw a great big wobbly. That’s the difficulty I want in video games.
I don’t know if I’d have been satisfied if this was it. If MM9 was the end it would feel like a triumphant retro celebration. If this was, it’d feel like getting a little more juice out of the lemon (ha), nothing more.
Good thing there’s one more game to go. Review 100 approaches. Mega Man 11 approaches.
No clever review this time. This is just a very good golf game that feels like Kirby's Dream Course, while being a smidge more grounded. Great course design, simple mechanics, and the pure satisfaction of a hole in one is just fantastic. Amazing little multiplayer game, thankfully preserved and translated in this modern age.
A tiny little mystery for smart frogs and/or detectives, now accompanied by their trusty and/or decorative notebooks. It feels like the most limited entry in the series, but I checked with a few people and it turns out that doesn’t matter on bit! Phew.
The perfect “children at play” writing is here again, and many a chuckle was had. Like… genuinely, I have so few gripes, especially for price. It was kind of a pain to find one of the pies, I guess? But it’s a tiny little bunch of houses so who cares, it can only delay THIS detective so long.
The perfect “children at play” writing is here again, and many a chuckle was had. Like… genuinely, I have so few gripes, especially for price. It was kind of a pain to find one of the pies, I guess? But it’s a tiny little bunch of houses so who cares, it can only delay THIS detective so long.
This review contains spoilers
This review is based on a single playthrough, wherein I:
- met 8 of the girls, 6 of which I got into tokimeki state by the end
- focused mostly on athletics
- ended up with Nozomi Kiyokawa
- failed to get a 2nd rate job
- did not have a single bomb go off during my run
With these sorts of romance games it feels disingenuous to try for other routes, so I think it's probably important to break down how things went in comparison to other reviewers' runs.
This is an interesting game to play, having seen Tim Rogers' lengthy review of the playstation version, and knowing that a greater version (multiple versions, even) is out in the world. The work on this SNES port (and the fan-translation itself) is really impressive, but a small part of me know that what I really want is a more advanced version with voice acting and a scrolling background that moves smoother than the one in this.
Mechanically it's neat, reminding of everything from simgirl to dark souls to an excel spreadsheet. Put numbers in, do better. Simple. Use the phone to go on dates, gather information, or pester the rich kid. So far, so simple, though a lapse in memory meant I forgot how to get girls' numbers in this, which could have been fatal. I enjoyed how certain scenes and girls are locked behind combinations of different numbers, though them usually being numbers that go up together kind of made it feel a bit arbritrary, which... I mean it kind of is. If you know the numbers you want you're basically just committing to a goal and waiting for scenes to break up the monotony.
The scenes are good, though. Walks home, special occasions, and hall bumpings happen automatically, but dates require you to organise them, and to choose options that won't fuck off your date. The dates are cute, and the second you realise that there are special scenes if you take the right girl to the right place at the right time they suddenly become the main attraction. Of COURSE I want to take Nozomi bowling in Winter so she can fucking kill me with an errant ball. Yes I want to feel vaguely guilty when Shiori reminds me of childhood adventures that make us feel fated, all while I treat her as largely tertiary. And yes, I want to see Yujari get a wet t-shirt, or so the game has decided. They're all sweet moments, and hunting them out actually makes it way easier to stat bombless throughout.
I'm told the bomb system goes away in later games, and I'm disappointed to learn that, because it's an easy to manage system that makes sure you give all your friendships attention, and allows you to ascribe some negative personality traits to the girls and flesh them out a bit. For the most part the only girls who came close to bombing me were Yuko (of course, she's a firecracker, chaotic energy that wants your attention) and Shiori (creating the impression of a childhood friend who, while uninterested in me romantically, damn well doesn't want to share me, made all the more believable by the blank expression she usually regarded me with), and both felt all the more interesting for it.
This game rules, if it wasn't clear. A well-written, well-made game whose influence you can feel in more modern romance games with very little effort, and in a bunch of other game types if you squint a little.
Now imagine if I was playing a better version of it!
- met 8 of the girls, 6 of which I got into tokimeki state by the end
- focused mostly on athletics
- ended up with Nozomi Kiyokawa
- failed to get a 2nd rate job
- did not have a single bomb go off during my run
With these sorts of romance games it feels disingenuous to try for other routes, so I think it's probably important to break down how things went in comparison to other reviewers' runs.
This is an interesting game to play, having seen Tim Rogers' lengthy review of the playstation version, and knowing that a greater version (multiple versions, even) is out in the world. The work on this SNES port (and the fan-translation itself) is really impressive, but a small part of me know that what I really want is a more advanced version with voice acting and a scrolling background that moves smoother than the one in this.
Mechanically it's neat, reminding of everything from simgirl to dark souls to an excel spreadsheet. Put numbers in, do better. Simple. Use the phone to go on dates, gather information, or pester the rich kid. So far, so simple, though a lapse in memory meant I forgot how to get girls' numbers in this, which could have been fatal. I enjoyed how certain scenes and girls are locked behind combinations of different numbers, though them usually being numbers that go up together kind of made it feel a bit arbritrary, which... I mean it kind of is. If you know the numbers you want you're basically just committing to a goal and waiting for scenes to break up the monotony.
The scenes are good, though. Walks home, special occasions, and hall bumpings happen automatically, but dates require you to organise them, and to choose options that won't fuck off your date. The dates are cute, and the second you realise that there are special scenes if you take the right girl to the right place at the right time they suddenly become the main attraction. Of COURSE I want to take Nozomi bowling in Winter so she can fucking kill me with an errant ball. Yes I want to feel vaguely guilty when Shiori reminds me of childhood adventures that make us feel fated, all while I treat her as largely tertiary. And yes, I want to see Yujari get a wet t-shirt, or so the game has decided. They're all sweet moments, and hunting them out actually makes it way easier to stat bombless throughout.
I'm told the bomb system goes away in later games, and I'm disappointed to learn that, because it's an easy to manage system that makes sure you give all your friendships attention, and allows you to ascribe some negative personality traits to the girls and flesh them out a bit. For the most part the only girls who came close to bombing me were Yuko (of course, she's a firecracker, chaotic energy that wants your attention) and Shiori (creating the impression of a childhood friend who, while uninterested in me romantically, damn well doesn't want to share me, made all the more believable by the blank expression she usually regarded me with), and both felt all the more interesting for it.
This game rules, if it wasn't clear. A well-written, well-made game whose influence you can feel in more modern romance games with very little effort, and in a bunch of other game types if you squint a little.
Now imagine if I was playing a better version of it!
2021
A little tasty morsel of a platformer from a non-existent age, and while I’m never going to care about getting faster times, the dash and jumps feels so nice that I’m more than satisfied with my basic playthrough. Also it cost me pennies, so I’ve nothing more to ask of it.
2000
I was fond of this when it came out, and it is fun to play, but it’s ultimately just a lead-in to the sequel we got in the same calendar year, which is so much better it isn’t funny.
2013
This review contains spoilers
This feels like the emblem of a certain age, which feels appropriate for something that came some 8 years into its generation. It's Uncharted, it's Assassin's Creed, it's Gears of War, it's inexplicably still Tomb Raider despite this, it has a needless multiplayer mode, it has a definitive edition with a face change and downloadable content. It has a distinct ludonarrative dissonance. It isn't very colourful and falls apart in the final stretch, because of glitches and a rushed finish. Quick-time events up the arse. RPG/upgrade mechanics. Special editions and retailer-exclusive bonuses. The only way it could be more emblematic of the seventh generation of video games is if it had fucking some sort of needless motion control in it. Which... I mean I played this on deck, no guarantee it didn't have some basic gyro on ps3 or something.
To be so emblematic of its generation isn't in itself a bad thing. The game is good. I mean... outside the multiplayer, I'm too cool to waste my life trying that out, but that aside the game is eminently playable, with some fantastic feeling mechanics, such as the near-perfect strain of the bow, or the nice chunky shotgun. The platforming (arguably the most crucial thing to get right) is fun, despite a weird magnetism to Lara that flings her across to the nearest bright white object at any given moment. You forgive a lot when the scramble of Lara across a map is still zippy and does (largely) what you want it to do.
Story's a big pile of wank. Bunch of arseholes I don't care about making stupid decisions all the time, with a clunky selection of mentor, obvious villain, nerd, angry woman, chunky kiwi, and lesbian life partner that feel less cookie cutter and more like someone trying to drearily recreate the shape of a cookie cutter by tearing at the dough. They're just boring box-ticking exercises for what you'd expect from a AAA game of the time, or a mid-budget action flick of the time.
There is a villain. He's Salazar from Resident Evil 4, as played by a mercenary who didn't quite know how to play the part. There are other men of various sizes available throughout. At one point a large man immune to headshots appeared, and I can't even remember if we knew about him beforehand. He felt important, but wasn't exactly a thrilling boss fight.
Despite this, the scenarios feel pretty good. Lara's big murder journey around the island is a thrilling jump from location to location, usually with a chaotic and irreversible sequence pushing you between them. Her transformation from hesitant murder machine to resolute murder machine is great to follow. It's just the characters surrounding Lara that let it down.
So what, where is this going? Do I like it? Yeah, to about the measure of three stars. Would I recommend it? Yeah, if you like finding trinkets and killing people until a bunch of things say 100%. It satisfies in that regard. Just don't expect anything different to anything else that had come along that generation.
Oh, it has inexplicable quick travel, too.
To be so emblematic of its generation isn't in itself a bad thing. The game is good. I mean... outside the multiplayer, I'm too cool to waste my life trying that out, but that aside the game is eminently playable, with some fantastic feeling mechanics, such as the near-perfect strain of the bow, or the nice chunky shotgun. The platforming (arguably the most crucial thing to get right) is fun, despite a weird magnetism to Lara that flings her across to the nearest bright white object at any given moment. You forgive a lot when the scramble of Lara across a map is still zippy and does (largely) what you want it to do.
Story's a big pile of wank. Bunch of arseholes I don't care about making stupid decisions all the time, with a clunky selection of mentor, obvious villain, nerd, angry woman, chunky kiwi, and lesbian life partner that feel less cookie cutter and more like someone trying to drearily recreate the shape of a cookie cutter by tearing at the dough. They're just boring box-ticking exercises for what you'd expect from a AAA game of the time, or a mid-budget action flick of the time.
There is a villain. He's Salazar from Resident Evil 4, as played by a mercenary who didn't quite know how to play the part. There are other men of various sizes available throughout. At one point a large man immune to headshots appeared, and I can't even remember if we knew about him beforehand. He felt important, but wasn't exactly a thrilling boss fight.
Despite this, the scenarios feel pretty good. Lara's big murder journey around the island is a thrilling jump from location to location, usually with a chaotic and irreversible sequence pushing you between them. Her transformation from hesitant murder machine to resolute murder machine is great to follow. It's just the characters surrounding Lara that let it down.
So what, where is this going? Do I like it? Yeah, to about the measure of three stars. Would I recommend it? Yeah, if you like finding trinkets and killing people until a bunch of things say 100%. It satisfies in that regard. Just don't expect anything different to anything else that had come along that generation.
Oh, it has inexplicable quick travel, too.
1989
I feel like an eternal question among Mega Man fans is whether this or Mega Man 3 is better. I’m still a whole replay of a game away from answering that question, but one I didn’t expect to come across was… is this even better than the original?
I’m the sort of game-playing person who loves exploratory first entries in series, warts and all, and as such the original Mega Man really does it for me, from the needless scores to the tight selection of bosses to the frankly impossibly useful elec beam pause glitch. Mega Man 2 still feels like it’s working stuff out, but has bells, whistles, and robot masters galore, a much more polished experience only really let down by a final boss trio that starts annoying and ends boring (hilarious as the final reveal is). But all that polish means I have to take the flaws more seriously (what few there are), and also means it’s just… less exciting.
That said, it still rules, and the things it does better it REALLY does better. I found myself using far more of my abilities outside of boss rooms, especially the new trio of items, all of which feel like what the magnet beam was supposed to be, but without the bullshit of being optional items. Item 1 in particular is kind of amazing, as being able to generate three platforms should be busted as all heck, but it just works and provides a couple of late game challenges. The wood shield… well, it is actually busted, trivialising certain rooms, but that just makes me feel like a certified G and bonafide stud for having obtained it. Also shout out to Flash Man’s power, which can’t even fully kill Quick Man. Miserable.
Having a specific boss rush rather than the original’s way of integrating them into the Wily levels is… better. I want to say better. It feels more video gamey, and is a nice challenge. It seems a shame to have lost that touch of stumbling across an old foe again as you close in on Wily. It’s more purposeful, more deliberate, for good or ill.
Beyond that it’s just the things you already know. Stages look good and are less cheap than the original. The music is genuinely an all-timer soundtrack for 8-bit systems. The little easter egg (ha) of being able to have birds replace the stars when you select a stage shows a sense of fun and attention to detail that would come to define the series for me. It just works. The whole thing just works.
But which would I rather replay? Well, the original, but this is nipping at its heels, and as I go to replay MM3 I feel like a new king is out to pick up his crown. But we’ll see how that plays out.
I’m the sort of game-playing person who loves exploratory first entries in series, warts and all, and as such the original Mega Man really does it for me, from the needless scores to the tight selection of bosses to the frankly impossibly useful elec beam pause glitch. Mega Man 2 still feels like it’s working stuff out, but has bells, whistles, and robot masters galore, a much more polished experience only really let down by a final boss trio that starts annoying and ends boring (hilarious as the final reveal is). But all that polish means I have to take the flaws more seriously (what few there are), and also means it’s just… less exciting.
That said, it still rules, and the things it does better it REALLY does better. I found myself using far more of my abilities outside of boss rooms, especially the new trio of items, all of which feel like what the magnet beam was supposed to be, but without the bullshit of being optional items. Item 1 in particular is kind of amazing, as being able to generate three platforms should be busted as all heck, but it just works and provides a couple of late game challenges. The wood shield… well, it is actually busted, trivialising certain rooms, but that just makes me feel like a certified G and bonafide stud for having obtained it. Also shout out to Flash Man’s power, which can’t even fully kill Quick Man. Miserable.
Having a specific boss rush rather than the original’s way of integrating them into the Wily levels is… better. I want to say better. It feels more video gamey, and is a nice challenge. It seems a shame to have lost that touch of stumbling across an old foe again as you close in on Wily. It’s more purposeful, more deliberate, for good or ill.
Beyond that it’s just the things you already know. Stages look good and are less cheap than the original. The music is genuinely an all-timer soundtrack for 8-bit systems. The little easter egg (ha) of being able to have birds replace the stars when you select a stage shows a sense of fun and attention to detail that would come to define the series for me. It just works. The whole thing just works.
But which would I rather replay? Well, the original, but this is nipping at its heels, and as I go to replay MM3 I feel like a new king is out to pick up his crown. But we’ll see how that plays out.
2022
A fun way to learn what the steam deck can do. Bit alarmed the analog sticks know when my thumbs are on them, via some ancient magic or uh I guess the same way love testers work.
Actual writing of the game yo-yos between just fine and genuinely funny, which checks out with the world of Portal, and that'll do just fine.
I do wish there was... more, though. Couple of arcadey minigames thrown in or something like that.
Actual writing of the game yo-yos between just fine and genuinely funny, which checks out with the world of Portal, and that'll do just fine.
I do wish there was... more, though. Couple of arcadey minigames thrown in or something like that.
This review contains spoilers
Oh great, now I have to be haunted by this game for the rest of my life. To be cursed by a disquieting tale of folklore, superstition, archaeology and cats that falls somewhere between Lovecraft and The Wicker Man without truly being quite like either.
I often struggle with what I specifically want to talk about when reviewing a game, but here it’s only more so. I’m a southern person whose family come from a small bit of Wales, and who spent over half a decade living in the north, and those differing perspectives and tones and communities all inform how I’m perceiving Thomasina, how I’m perceiving this village, and the northern sorts within. The alienation, the closeness, wariness of others, distance from anyone but the village you live in, there’s stuff to connect to that makes you understand the less sinister characters more, but does nothing to lessen the unease when dealing with peculiarities, eccentrics and absentees, none more than the local lord, who upon your meeting (well, re-meeting, his identity is unknown earlier on) shows you his DEFINITELY NOT SUSPICIOUS ancient church he’s having rebuilt to bring back the worship of something… old. Forgotten. Dangerous.
You have regular nightmares, visions of the barrow you’ve come to excavate, communicating with a sort of goblin creature (the mythology is brilliantly explained, but I’ll keep it simple here), trying to convince you that your ultimate goal is to free him. Thomasina talks to the player via a letter to her Mother, some time after the game’s story has finished. We know that whatever he’s promising isn’t going to be what we really want. But the deception, the corruption of him, infested with the increasingly powerful, sanity-breaking, unseen Abraxas, is still a gut punch, as you see that no matter the intent, this evil is beyond anything anyone could have prepared for. And Thomasina’s fate is a capstone on that.
There’s a lot about Thomasina’s Father. He’s the root of the story, after all, bedridden, incommunicative and non-functioning as he is. We all have Daddy issues, but the way this played out was unanticipated. To not truly know your parent, to then learn they were something the opposite of what you expected, and had done something terrible along the way… it’s effective.
The whole game is effective. The hens are gone. The church is risen. Abraxas walks.
I often struggle with what I specifically want to talk about when reviewing a game, but here it’s only more so. I’m a southern person whose family come from a small bit of Wales, and who spent over half a decade living in the north, and those differing perspectives and tones and communities all inform how I’m perceiving Thomasina, how I’m perceiving this village, and the northern sorts within. The alienation, the closeness, wariness of others, distance from anyone but the village you live in, there’s stuff to connect to that makes you understand the less sinister characters more, but does nothing to lessen the unease when dealing with peculiarities, eccentrics and absentees, none more than the local lord, who upon your meeting (well, re-meeting, his identity is unknown earlier on) shows you his DEFINITELY NOT SUSPICIOUS ancient church he’s having rebuilt to bring back the worship of something… old. Forgotten. Dangerous.
You have regular nightmares, visions of the barrow you’ve come to excavate, communicating with a sort of goblin creature (the mythology is brilliantly explained, but I’ll keep it simple here), trying to convince you that your ultimate goal is to free him. Thomasina talks to the player via a letter to her Mother, some time after the game’s story has finished. We know that whatever he’s promising isn’t going to be what we really want. But the deception, the corruption of him, infested with the increasingly powerful, sanity-breaking, unseen Abraxas, is still a gut punch, as you see that no matter the intent, this evil is beyond anything anyone could have prepared for. And Thomasina’s fate is a capstone on that.
There’s a lot about Thomasina’s Father. He’s the root of the story, after all, bedridden, incommunicative and non-functioning as he is. We all have Daddy issues, but the way this played out was unanticipated. To not truly know your parent, to then learn they were something the opposite of what you expected, and had done something terrible along the way… it’s effective.
The whole game is effective. The hens are gone. The church is risen. Abraxas walks.
2018
Mega Man rose from the dead, again! Again! Capcom's premiere lemon-blaster was brought back to us all in 2018, with all the bells and whistles one would expect of a new entry in a classic series, plus a new mechanic or two to spice things up! And it's... fine, it's fine. It's okay. I'm a little mad about it.
Mega Man 11 is a game of two halves. Getting going in the starting half is an exercise in gaining ground in inches, or was for me at least. For half the robot masters the process was to repeatedly smash my face into a wall to no avail, eating shit against some of the cheaper levels in the whole series, slowly building bolts until I could buy a few items and blow through the robot master itself. From there we have the other half of those levels, easier, goofier, more fun fare like Bounce Man's stage, which I adored, but that only provided a temporary respite, as if I was following weapon order they were in between the harsh levels. The back half of the game, though, is where things change. The second Fortress stage has a conveyor belt screen where it just feeds you those little yellow endlessly spawning fellas, and literally slides the loot from their bodies down towards Mega Man. A grinding spot! Suddenly all items are available, and the game becomes a gag through to the end, an end that also features the easiest Wily ever.
If you'll excuse me indulging myself in some wankery, this slide from annoying difficulty into annoying ease represents a poor use of flow (as in the state brought about when high skill meets high challenge to the perfect degree) within the game. You aren't skilled enough early on to make the best use of the gear system and progress smoothly, and you need very little skill whatsoever to deal with the lack of challenge found in the end run. There's no flow state to achieve, and so that magic feeling of 'great video game' can't be found here, for me at least.
There's still a lot to love. Robot Master powers now come with a proper costume change, somewhat reminiscent of Mighty No.9, but good. The powers themselves are pretty fun, and can be modified with the power gear for greater utility. The power and speed gears are a good lark, even with the timer feeling a touch restrictive. Rush gets unique buttons for Jet and Coil, rather than needing to specifically select them! I get to enjoy having the slide again! But more than anything I just felt irritable. The new powers are good but it's not always clear when you NEED to be using them to proceed smoothly. The gears are fun, but Mega Man himself feels kind of clunky compared to his 8-bit best. Rush Jet is simultaneously the worse version of itself and still too OP for skipping whole sections of game. Everything is held back by something else.
Despite all the negatives at play here, and the gameplay feeling rough, it's still Mega Man. The core is here. Even the anime-adjacent storytelling is here, for the people who like that. Fully voice-acted, too. Even in the shop. Repeating the same phrase over and over. As I buy 9 e tanks. One. At. A. Time. Roll, please. Please, just be quiet for a second.
I lost my train of thought. My point is that even with annoyances, it doesn't feel like a tribute act. Inafune isn't here and wasn't needed. The creative team understand Mega Man. It makes me hopeful for the future, even with a gap this large and with no sign of a Mega Man 12. Hopefully they get together for it whenever it does happen. Failing that, I've just finished 17 Mega Man games and am finally free of this curse. Three stars, for fun, for potential, and for ending so I can move on! Good game! I need to not play a Mega Man for a bit!
Mega Man 11 is a game of two halves. Getting going in the starting half is an exercise in gaining ground in inches, or was for me at least. For half the robot masters the process was to repeatedly smash my face into a wall to no avail, eating shit against some of the cheaper levels in the whole series, slowly building bolts until I could buy a few items and blow through the robot master itself. From there we have the other half of those levels, easier, goofier, more fun fare like Bounce Man's stage, which I adored, but that only provided a temporary respite, as if I was following weapon order they were in between the harsh levels. The back half of the game, though, is where things change. The second Fortress stage has a conveyor belt screen where it just feeds you those little yellow endlessly spawning fellas, and literally slides the loot from their bodies down towards Mega Man. A grinding spot! Suddenly all items are available, and the game becomes a gag through to the end, an end that also features the easiest Wily ever.
If you'll excuse me indulging myself in some wankery, this slide from annoying difficulty into annoying ease represents a poor use of flow (as in the state brought about when high skill meets high challenge to the perfect degree) within the game. You aren't skilled enough early on to make the best use of the gear system and progress smoothly, and you need very little skill whatsoever to deal with the lack of challenge found in the end run. There's no flow state to achieve, and so that magic feeling of 'great video game' can't be found here, for me at least.
There's still a lot to love. Robot Master powers now come with a proper costume change, somewhat reminiscent of Mighty No.9, but good. The powers themselves are pretty fun, and can be modified with the power gear for greater utility. The power and speed gears are a good lark, even with the timer feeling a touch restrictive. Rush gets unique buttons for Jet and Coil, rather than needing to specifically select them! I get to enjoy having the slide again! But more than anything I just felt irritable. The new powers are good but it's not always clear when you NEED to be using them to proceed smoothly. The gears are fun, but Mega Man himself feels kind of clunky compared to his 8-bit best. Rush Jet is simultaneously the worse version of itself and still too OP for skipping whole sections of game. Everything is held back by something else.
Despite all the negatives at play here, and the gameplay feeling rough, it's still Mega Man. The core is here. Even the anime-adjacent storytelling is here, for the people who like that. Fully voice-acted, too. Even in the shop. Repeating the same phrase over and over. As I buy 9 e tanks. One. At. A. Time. Roll, please. Please, just be quiet for a second.
I lost my train of thought. My point is that even with annoyances, it doesn't feel like a tribute act. Inafune isn't here and wasn't needed. The creative team understand Mega Man. It makes me hopeful for the future, even with a gap this large and with no sign of a Mega Man 12. Hopefully they get together for it whenever it does happen. Failing that, I've just finished 17 Mega Man games and am finally free of this curse. Three stars, for fun, for potential, and for ending so I can move on! Good game! I need to not play a Mega Man for a bit!
1994
Jank, but the sort of jank you enjoy because it lead to actually good stuff.
2021
It always feels weird reviewing a fighting game because it's entirely up to the player what counts as 'finishing', what counts as a complete enough experience to review, and what stones can be left unturned.
I have put in the time, finished the extensive turorials, built up a nice win/loss record, finished arcade mode, and done a bunch of fishing. I have not played story mode, or played as a single character other than I-No outside of the tutorials.
So... not a complete experience. But what I got to enjoy instead was a fantastic guitar witch simulator, with chunky hits and simplified mechanics that make for the best I-No experience I've ever had. An absolute joy, and a wonderful way of getting all up in gender feelings because who doesn't wish they could become a beautiful witch with an angry hat.
Highly recommended if you have femme-oriented dysphoria, enjoy chunky feeling fighters, or hated how it was a half-circle input to stroke in Xrd.
I have put in the time, finished the extensive turorials, built up a nice win/loss record, finished arcade mode, and done a bunch of fishing. I have not played story mode, or played as a single character other than I-No outside of the tutorials.
So... not a complete experience. But what I got to enjoy instead was a fantastic guitar witch simulator, with chunky hits and simplified mechanics that make for the best I-No experience I've ever had. An absolute joy, and a wonderful way of getting all up in gender feelings because who doesn't wish they could become a beautiful witch with an angry hat.
Highly recommended if you have femme-oriented dysphoria, enjoy chunky feeling fighters, or hated how it was a half-circle input to stroke in Xrd.