I played this only once with a friend for like 2 hours straight at a Dave and Busters in my childhood, but it made such an impression on me that imagery from the game has been a presumed hallucination in my nascent subconscious until NOW, when I finally bothered to do 2 minutes of research and discovered that it was, in fact, real!! Watched a full playthrough and was so moved and blown away, it's even more picturesque and dreamy than I remembered.

an outrageously beautiful phantasmagorical adventure threaded with some childlike fantasyscapes occasionally on par with like, Little Nemo or Laputa, which it clearly derives influence from. There's something compelling to me about the motif of mine-kart/handcar levels in games and the way they present these really expressive locational snapshots in this simple, kinetic way, like little memories you can only briefly glance at while focused on the reflexive task at hand. The arcade machine itself was so whimsical and striking, and I remember the feeling of strenuously bobbing the levers in alternation with your partner creating such a fun sense of exhilaration and synchrony. I also remember being fucking physically WRECKED after playing this and i'm sure my spinal cord would fully disintegrate if I miraculously found another machine to play it on today. This seems to have a lot of similarities with the Japan-only title PSX Love Love Truck (including referring to a handcar as a truck??) which i also need to seek out and play now!

update: did a little bit more digging and found out that a ton of the visual elements from this game are apparently repurposed assets from a shelved Thomas the Tank Engine title that SEGA was working on at the time? Wild!

As the proud owner of a VW bug myself, this is essentially the perfect game for me. It fulfills my ultimate fantasy; what if my car could fly 200 feet into the air and had an explosive rocket launcher? Really though this game is super fun. You can pick from a few magnificent colours for your bug and play by yourself or against friends in a few different styles of races, or take them on in this game's best mode; beetle battle. Imagine the mariokart battle modes but on crack and you have a beetle battle. All of the items (yes, this game has mariokart style items.) are super fun and perfect for causing large amounts of chaos. Your car can shoot rockets, achieve super speed, and plant land mines among a few other things. Also this game has some surprisingly decent music, which adds a lot to its charm. I’m not kidding when I say Beetle Adventure Racing is one of the most fun promotional/licensed games ever made.

brutal doom for the video essay generation well, color me impressed. this is actually cool!

it seems like every other day i find a new indie game or analog horror video in my youtube feed using hackneyed "subversions of expectation" or file manipulation or arg elements for spooks. imscared was cool, but imscared came out 12 years ago. so when i heard about myhouse.wad, i brushed it off. it wasn't until last night that i bit the bullet, and let me tell you: i should have done it sooner.

the house of leaves inspiration is blatant enough as to call it an adaptation. there's no point in dissecting it, but i'd like to use it to explain why my house doesn't suffer from the pitfalls you might expect. remember how house of leaves has a bunch of hidden shit inside of it that redditors have been talking to death for years? well, you don't need it to enjoy the book. it's an addendum for people who wanna go crazy over that kind of stuff. my house is the same way with its metahorror. the creepypasta elements are contained in the downloadable journal rather than the game itself. the "deeply emotional" (read: tactless and generic internet psychological horror) themes fans don't shut up about are contained in secret content that you won't find unless you're looking for it. in that case, why should you play the wad?

cuz it's a damn good time! if you liked lost in vivo's combat-heavy take on otherworld from silent hill, you'll like my house. the maps are super pretty and fun to explore. there are cool new enemies too! if nothing else, play it to see a modern action horror doom map with strong atmosphere. it only took me 30 minutes and i'd recommend it even if you already know the "twists".

as much as i still want to mock the fandom and compare it to brutal doom, i do hope this inspires people to take full advantage of gzdoom's special features. maybe someone will make a map that uses similar technical tricks to make something in a genre other than horror. as it stands, i super enjoyed my time in my house and i recommend it to all the skeptics. this one's different.

SOLD

Sporting a Killer Instinct style combo breaking system, the best underboob of all time, custom combos, some of the most beautiful graphics on Saturn, and a ton of anime references, Astra Superstars is one of my favorite games. It's very simple mechanically, but how it unfolds is not so easy to grasp. It's not too much mind you. The operation is kept simple enough so that you can kind of just mash through arcade mode with little resistance. The actual nuances are in various minutia of it's character gameplay design.

An example is how this game doesn't have special moves, only 6 unique normals. No command normals either, instead you have 2 moves you can perform as you bounce off a wall from heavy knockback, and 2 turning normals for if you're behind an opponent. Typically over or below them. See, in this game you're both in flight, but unlike how other games might do it the lower part of the screen is treated exactly like how the upper part is. You literally just jump downwards. Those turn normals seem useful in neutral, the most devious left rights ever you might imagine. But they're also important combo bridging tools. In this game everyone has very over the top squash and stretch, looney tunes esque moves. You tend to launch the opponent pretty far, which seems fine because everything is dash cancellable-- except in the corner. If the screen can't scroll in that direction, you can't dash cancel your normals that way. It seems like this is a hard line the game draws. The chain system is very freeform, so you end up getting decent combos by just doing a few dash cancels with the light auto combo into mediums, then 2 jump cancel (knock them down, follow downward, then back up!) heavies into a super.

The solution is that you don't really have to carry them there! You can launch them upwards or downwards, dash over or below them, and then use your turn normals as a solid combo bridge, as your own back will act like a surface for them to collide with. It's very very cool in motion. It's extremely DBZ.

Other examples are how the placement of your normals really matter. Even though everyone has giant normals, there's ostensible dead zones you're meant to manually compensate for. And like, you actually totally can. For what would normally be an awkward or impossible area to hit for a normal fighting game character due to being locked into just having specific moves with specific hitboxes, Astra Superstars characters can just do it because they can jump downwards. You can also cancel either the down or up jump at any point. A normal hits low, then very high, but you don't have time to wait for it to connect high? You can just spike them downward and press it or do it rising. Vice versa too. Every character has a moveset with specific multi hitting or wide arcing moves that can hit in a myriad of different ways that all matter due to very granular positioning intricacies. Very pleasant game, amazing art and music. Insane presentation, it's honestly kind of perfect!

Tengo el world record de speedrun en este juego :v

El Mejor juego basado en tokusatsu. Captura la esencia de las este estilo de obras en sus peleas increíblemente bien. Es sorprendentemente original para ser tan simple.

Es un boss rush cortito y divertido, lo recomendo mucho. Hubiese estado genial entender algo, pero está todo en japones

Vean garo 2006.

podcast fodder. it occurred to me over the course of playing that for four-player couch co-op like this, the mindlessness is a boon. you're supposed to be catching up with your friends and fucking around, not actually invested in the game.

it pulls surprisingly heavily from the original gauntlet with little variation: destroy generators that endlessly spawn, open chests and gates with keys, use potions as AoEs, destroy walls, open other walls. the only other mechanical changes is some light meter management, where you can activate one of three different special abilities depending on the level of the gauge or siphon some off to use a dash-twirl kinda action. other than weaving those in, you'll just be mashing the shoot/attack button, and with the advent of a 3D world and shifting perspective for the game, they've slathered auto-aim all over your toolkit, so there's almost no engagement other than being there to press the button... and if you're close enough to an enemy you'll auto-attack anyway, so who cares.

the main intrigue instead is the variety of environments and stages, each with their own hazards and puzzles to solve. you might rend an arena asunder by pressing a switch, skewing the two halves apart and exposing new corridors in the process. there's moments where you'll rearrange a set of catwalks by pressing a series of switches (although you never have access to more than one at once) to raise and lower them to match your character's height. in some (many) instances, you must painstakingly root out a breakable wall and enter it to press a switch and open a different wall somewhere else. indeed, most of the game consists of finding switches to press to access a new area; it is not uncommon for there to be chains of three to seven switches that lead to each other in the span of a single room. is what the switches activate occasionally cool, giving you a new path through the often intricate area designs? sure. but expect the whole game to follow virtually the exact same loop throughout: mash attack, press switch.

there's occasional gesturing to more of diablo-like system, the style which would quickly eat this series' lunch by the sixth gen, though it often doesn't land given the game's arcade-focused nature. other than adding a leveling and stats system to the original gauntlet experience, there's also this odd loot/power-up component, some of which is random but others of which are actually specific, often obscure unlockables within particular levels. of course, seeing as there's no permanence regarding items beyond keys/potions, these end up being temporary powerups; the thrill of grinding out skorne 1 so that you can get a piece of his armor set feels quaint when faced with the reality that said item will disappear 90 seconds into the next stage you play. as an aside: per the original game you're intended to replenish your health or revive yourself with extra credits, but seeing as this console version does not have that system, dying will kick you back out to the hub with whatever health you had going in. that might seem fine, but if you actually want to replenish to full health, expect to spend a lot of time grinding the first level for the 400-500 in health pickups that are guaranteed. for my final boss run, where I needed my level 60 max of 7000 health after spending most of the game maintaining about 2000, this was quite a chore.

this sega dreamcast version seems like a hodge-podge of each of the other versions of this game. compared to the playstation and n64 versions, which have a different set of levels and a proper inventory system, the dreamcast version serves as a more direct port of the original's levels and item system. oddly enough, it does have the additional endgame levels and skorne refight from the original home ports. it also carries in certain mechanical changes from the game's incremental sequel dark legacy, such as all of the new character classes and a functionally useless block ability; what the fuck is the point of a block in a mostly ranged game where having attack advantage is always a priority to avoid getting flanked and overwhelmed? probably the most bizarre aspect of the dreamcast version is that it runs like dogshit even with only a single player, and it retains the somewhat hideous look of the original game. not sure why the dc wasn't able to handle a relatively low-poly game built for a 3DFX banshee gpu, but I'm going to assume fault on the part of the developers.

still, a podcast game with some cool level visuals has its own appeal. was unfortunately left curious about dark legacy and the later gameplay revisions in seven sorrows. an arcade-style dungeon crawler does appeal to me in a base way, and I appreciate that this was an early attempt at creating an arcade game with a proper progression system (including rudimentary usernames and passwords!). should probably bring some friends along for the ride if I ever get a wild hair to try again.

Imagineer coined a uniquely minimal (level-less, item-limited, currency-less and party-less) form of JRPG with Quest 64, whose light storytelling, vast 3D areas and day/night cycles brought them closer to computer-RPGs than to its console-born siblings. What is undoubtedly CRPG-like - however, is their flexible upgrade system. Stat-leveling in the vein of FFII (i.e. earned from various parts of combat) is joined by collectible skill points distributed between 4 elements (which unlock new spells of that type and increase their power). Their combinations - from balanced spreads to a dual-type hyperfocus, governs the player's build with their own merits and limits. That sense of freedom well-complements their turn-based battles; seamless, responsive on-map gameplay with confined movement/dodging that's heavy on the spellcasting, reined in a little by elemental weaknesses and resistance. These two features rescue a work that otherwise would be dull and clumsy, as its lengthy overworld & dungeons plus a general dearth of content (other than a handful of pickups) make for some patience-testing trips. As a result, gameplay oscillates between moments of snappy, entertaining semi-action and sheer torture.

This brief project is many things at once, and - depending on taste, some conclusions are more prominent than others: A few great ideas placed on weak foundations. A half-baked mess. An interesting compromise between action & tactical gameplay. A novel fusion of Western/J-RPG languages, or even a grim omen of their genre's future; of the overscaled, empty worlds that progressively defined the next generation onwards. At the very least - though, a fascinating artifact of its era.

Man, Nintendo keeps putting out mid and stuff I already played, I really don't want to get back to that game I really don't like and complete it out of necessity. I might need to buy a Steam Deck or dig out that Retroid Pocket in my dresser, oh woe is me...help...won't someone please help...

Trumpets sound and clouds in the sky begin parting as heavenly light shines down upon me, Jupiter Corporation descends downward offering something in hand

"Here child, 2,700 Picross puzzles across nine games, only 4.99 each plus applicable taxes..."

Bless you o' green sailor senshi of thunder and courage, I am forever in your debt.

There's a SEWER LEVEL in the House of the Dead now. I'm fucking puking, what happened to the game I love?

My experience with this one as a kid was pretty simple: I thought the graphics looked amazing, the cabinet was the most threatening arcade cabinet I had seen, and I couldn't figure out the stupid gun waggling. No matter how much i shook that stupid uzi it would not reload.

BUT you CAN still play this one in an arcade. Which I did. At the Round One in Mentor, Ohio when I was staying in Cleveland a while back to be precise. If I remember correctly it's also at the Round One in Lincoln, Nebraska so if anyone wants to play HOTD4 with me, you know where to find me.

House of the Dead is an interesting franchise in that it really follows the trends of the time with each entry: 1 being haunted house horror a la Resident Evil 1, its sequel expanding to a full city as Resident Evil had, and the 3rd going for a more bananas science-fiction plot in accordance with the Resident Evil movie, really. 4 expands on the dumbass science-fiction stuff but now adds in the million billion zombies on screen that Dead Rising was teasing. Now, let me be clear, these are a LOT of zombies to shoot, and it was pretty crazy to see, and judging it specifically as a shooting gallery for you and your friends? Yeah it's good!

BUT, as a House of the Dead enthusiast there is a lot here that I think makes this the worst entry in the series by a country-mile. Yeah we have a ton of zombies on screen at once now, but we have lost the beautiful and detailed gore, which is a pretty fucking big thing to lose if you are House of the Dead.

Look, zombies are the only enemy you can blow apart limb from limb and not look like a total psycho doing it. All of the nation's freakazoids need this outlet or else they might start funding more Soldier of Fortune games.

So not only do you lose the gore, but also the enemy variety. As you'll mostly be fighting the same few humanoid zombies from the previous games, with none of the designs from 2 that made it such a memorable game. The booger monster returns though, thank fucking God. Might as well not even call it House of the Dead if you don't have the booger monster.

I also kind of like the waggle bullshit nowadays. I understand wanting to mix the gameplay up, so now instead of civilian rescues you shake zombies loose or shake open doors and the such. Honestly, this is a good fit as trying to pinpoint hit zombies to rescue civilians with an UZI would be a troll move. Your hand is gonna be SORE after playing this though. Unless you play Xenoblade Chronicles 2 you fucking pervert, your hand is sore enough already, christ, you make me sick. Really though, if you are gonna play an arcade game that vibrates your arm so hard it goes numb, I think LA Machineguns is the VASTLY superior game, but HOTD4 is just fun enough that I think it's worth it. (You remember LA Machineguns, right? Has the mounted guns that vibrate like fucking crazy when you shoot. Game rules. 4 stars.)

I'm spending this entire thing bitching! Bitching! About House of the Dead! What have I become? Anyway, the levels are also not as fun. 3 already had a downgrade due to it being in a very bland facility, but even once you escape the sewers and subway into the city, HOTD4 never hopes to look even an OUNCE as colorful as 3. It's most apparent when the final 2 levels are just the final 2 levels of HOTD2 again: journeying to Goldman's building in the same car from 2, battling the same enemies from 2, and it all feels like nostalgia-bait for a game that wasn't even THAT old when 4 came out.

Bosses are also a continuation of the step-down from 3, but thankfully not as time-consuming. The stupid secondary bar for staggering them still persists, not a mix-up in gameplay but a hindrance and a distraction on the UI. The final boss is a TOTAL time-sink though, as he has a god-forsaken SECOND PHASE. Oh my GOD Miyazaki, enough with this shit. The only boss that raises an eyebrow is the Kingdom Hearts villain you fight at Goldman's building. Not a joke BTW check this guy out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G3qUUqQFLtQ

His fight is just The Magician but with a worse design, essentially. But it is cool how his stupid Organization XIII coat gets riddled with a million bullets as you fight him. Those graphics, baby!

Actually, while the graphics were mind-blowing at the time, this is one of the instances where the visuals from this specific generation in gaming (360/PS3) looks really fugly in this day and age. You end up with a scenario where House of the Dead 2 looks BETTER because it has inspired art-direction and cleaner textures, while HOTD4 looks muddy and brown as everything from this era did.

While I think a lot of the personality and flare has been erased from the series, its penchant for historically Doofy dialogue somehow comes as naturally to House of the Dead as breathing might come to you and me. Even after years of jokes about it, Sega still manages to crank out the most baffling writing and voiceovers and thank Gosh In Heaven they do because this game has some gems from new AMS Agent Kate Green.

"When in doubt, turn left!" - Kate after the player chooses the left path.
"Aw, I used to love this shop!" - Kate observing a decimated store in the ruins of a city.
"Looks like you failed the test!" - Kate to Ansem
"You're paying for my dry-cleaning." - Kate to James after battling a sewer monster.

Special mention HAS to go to James Taylor's baffling sacrifice at the end of the game, where he sets his PDA to self-destruct and runs into the final boss to explode him. Couldn't he have just thrown the PDA at him? No matter, it's a VERY funny scene so I'm glad James committed to the bit.

I find it hard to hate this game, as the important stuff still matters: shooting zombies is fun, those SEGA arcade sound-effects still make me feel young and not old and unhealthy and needing to be put down like a Dog, and the more active gameplay means it IS an incredibly fun game to play 2 player, so highly recommended if you have friends. So, Xenoblade Chronicles 2 fans don't play.