702 Reviews liked by canti


It's shocking how Mighty Number 9 is good in literally any game, but it's own! Also helps that Gunvolt is really good too. Aside from the mild inspiration of the weapons you get from bosses, everything else feels very mega man and challenging in a good way.

It's a good classic Mega Man clone. The game itself is just "good", but the cool customization options stand out. Having so much control over how much damage you deal or take, which special skills are available to you, how your bullets behave, etc. was really fun to play around with. Didn't get much into the scoring system though.

Me defending my kitchen from Saddam Hussein.

I've decided "You are a bad person for continuing to play this video game, that you bought, which you are still progressing in" is my least favorite kind of video game narrative.

I enjoyed the first Superhot but couldn't shake the feeling there was something fundamentally unsatisfying about it. I think I figured it out, because it's just as bad here if not worse. The implication of "Time only moves when you do" and the marketing around it is that this lets the player do freaky, split-second, John-Wick-esque maneuvers to exterminate a room. But in practice the gameplay comes down to (1) figuring out how to remove enemies before they have a chance to act and (2) constantly checking your back because spawn points surround the whole area and enemies don't make noise until the damage is done. The most optimal way to play is to find a corner and wiggle your eyes until a red leg comes into view. Part of the issue is the devs are married to this wave-based survival-arena style of level design. I would love to see them try to merge these mechanics with a more traditional FPS setup.

Usually I hold off on rating/reviewing a game until I've beaten it but I just can't find the motivation to finish this now and I wanted to get my thoughts down. On a related note: did you know if you use the hotswap power on an enemy who hasn't completely emerged from their spawn point yet, you instantly die and have to start the whole stage over? Even if you were on the second to last room? It's true!

You know that meme that uncharitably reduces Spec Ops The Line to Turn off the game. This is someone being unironic about it.

Ultrakill feels like it was developed entirely in one night by a dude who snorted a bunch of cocaine, kept saying "you know what would be really sick?" and was right every time

incredible movement, shooting, mechanics, the things doom/quake type games usually get right.

terrible level design (especially in act 2), the thing doom/quake type games usually get wrong.

A game with a lot to say and really satisfying combat once you've figured it out, but unfortunately they let a horny teenager into the writing room and a mobile game designer into the game design room, and the rest of the team didn't notice what happened to the game until it was too late

Incredibly creative little game that also makes my brain hurt.

There has never been anything funnier in human history than the moment you think you have a good idea and then accidentally logic yourself out of existence and the music just cuts out to let you think about your hubris.

A man needs to get a wolf, a sheep and a cabbage across the river, but his boat can only carry one of these at a time; so he turns the wolf into another cabbage, and ten minutes later he figures out that's not the right solution and he needs to start all over again. This time he starts by turning himself into a second boat and-

I will never understand why this game is regarded as one of the worst Pokémon games, it's perfectly fine

As much as I see the flaws and ways it’s worse than explorers, the story, side characters, and music filled me with joy. The gameplay is fun and I actually cared about the world that was building before my eyes in my paradise.

everyone really hates this game but it holds a special place in my heart, while it may be the weakest mystery dungeon, it is still by far my favorite, though that mostly comes from sentimental value.

It will easily earn a five-star rating when finished.

I loved the part where they have gay robot sex and then gabriel said

"Machine! i'm ultracumming!"